Lucky Is a State of Mind

Lucky Is a State of Mind

I drive a Lexus, own a condo
And a spot in the elites

My parents call me their favorite
And my Uncle thinks I'm "sweet"

I've been promoted to partner recently
and got a huge raise

Everybody at the firm appreciates my hard work
A few thinks I'm a good lay

Some people are completely concerned
As if I'm completely insane

They really see
what I don't appear to be

A victim
defeated and maimed


I'm thinking I'm ahead of the curve
A pro at this unfair game

Every superhero must maintain
my way is with cocaine

I feel motivated and happy as I'm supposed to
And stay on top of my business

When really deep down inside
I just wish someone would listen

The reality of my situation is
I'm burned out
And harbor strong resentment

I'm embarrassed of being less than
And nothing more
The pain and suffering feels infinite

I do, do, do
Take, take, take
And smile through it all for them

The reality of my situation is
I'm bummed out
Only thing left of me is a stem


I'm not a flower anymore
lost my petals before I even blossomed

Lived life terrified and hopeless
Waiting for this "God" who people say is "awesome "

But the reality of my situation is
I really do believe
Just not in me

I'm not even proud of the person I am
How could he be?

Like a confused and helpless child
I ran away from "Home "

Struggled with forgiving and accepting myself
Felt useless, so I stayed gone.

Drugs, sex and money became my "savior"
I thought I was gaining potential

Riches, companionship and escape ....
These I thought were my essentials

A lot those close to me
show a lot of concern
As if I'm completely insane

They really see
What I don't yet see

a formed child victim,
Defeated and maimed...
And tamed

No one wants to hear me roar
they just want me to obey

My parents, my uncle and my other lovers
Know exactly what to say
To make it all seem okay
As I fight the urge to take my life away

Because the reality of my situation is
All I need is real love
Strong support

I had no guide
And as hard as I tried
I didn't have the tools and the knowledge to build my fort

People came into my "house" whenever and however
Left a huge mess behind

How could I have pride?
How can I fill this hole inside?
This is such a relentless world
How do survive?

I thought I found the answers
Stayed steadying the grind

So far it worked for me
I got a Lexus and a condo
It appears I'm doing quite fine

Now you see
I'm not what I appear to be
No real love or wealth,
Not even definite trust in myself

People would probably say I'm still lucky
And that good fortune has smiled upon me during these hard times

But the reality of my situation is....


Lucky is a state of mind.

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