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Friend issuesA few months ago my friend and I met this guy at an event we both attended. He came over and held a conversation with the both of us it
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Friend issues
A few months ago my friend and I met this guy at an event we both attended. He came over and held a conversation with the both of us it was a very casual conversation he inquired about where we from, what we both did for a living, just basic stuff he didn't really show an interest in either of us. This guy is very handsome and successful and had swag on 1000, I will admit I was attracted to him but once my friend made her interest in him known I didn't give him a second thought. Before the evening ended she found him and asked if he'd like to exchange numbers he said I'll take yours, she gave him her number he never called.
Recently she found him on Facebook and requested him he accepted and they messaged each other a few times and he stopped responding to her messages. I guess he must of came across my page in a linked photo and he sent me a friend request. I accepted and I told my friend. Shes like omg talk to him for me tell him that I like him, etc.. So I do what she asks. He and I are im'n each other back and forward about her on facebook he asks for my aim because he was heading out I give it to him.. Again I tell her about it. He and I are chatting and I'm biggin her up and telling him what a great girl she is and he says "enough about her what about you, tell me about yourself?" I'm like ok that's not important shes the one that likes you.. He says "iight well I like you, isn't it obvious I'm not interested in your freind?" I respond by saying I'm not comfortable with how this conversation is going and just stop responding...He continues to hit me up saying things like this
(2  17 PM): I kno thats ur friend but idnt even kno her I wanted to speak wit u tht nite but she slid in b4 I cld.
(2:36:49 PM): I undastand u being uncomfortable ask ur girl if shed be cool wit us kickin it
(2:39:52 PM): listen im flyin in for workouts soon think bout it mayb we cld go out wen i get up dere. take my numba hit me if ur interested () . on
(2:40:16 PM): the real ur girl shldnt get mad i neva rlly kicked it wit her. stop iggin me too lol
Do I tell her? Again I wont even front I am really attracted to him. But I don't want to violate the friend code. Would my continuing to speak with him violate the code? She keeps asking me what he said, I don't know what to say. HELLLLLPPPPPP
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Re: Friend issues
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Originally Posted by incogneato
Do I tell her? Again I wont even front I am really attracted to him. But I don't want to violate the friend code. Would my continuing to speak with him violate the code? She keeps asking me what he said, I don't know what to say. HELLLLLPPPPPP
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I'm big on friend code, but I'm also confuzzled about what to do when you run into a guy that you meet at the same time and both want.
Males seem to be on some "may the best man win." and both will come at you hard.
With females, it's been my experience that usually one friend defers to the other out of respect.
But since you've been acting as your friend's agent, wouldn't it be kinda fucked up if you starting dating him? 
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Re: Friend issues
Facebook is the Devil!
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Work like you don't need the money;
Dance like no one is watching;
Sing like no one is listening;
Love like you've never been hurt;
and live life every day as if it were your last...
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Re: Friend issues
I swear...this incog S/N on LSA is the most sleaziest, dumbest, whorish and trampish broad on this side hell...
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Re: Friend issues
See now, he's not even man enough to tell her flat out he isn't interested. Grant it, If I was your friend, I would've been got the point that he wasn't interested and moved on. But he should still be mature enough to tell her straight up he's not interested. But obviously he's not.
And your friend shouldn't be so beat. She had enough confidence to step to him, so she shouldn't be afraid of the rejection.
This happened to me several years ago. A guy I liked had expressed interest in one of my friends instead of me. My friend was attracted to this guy as well, so I told her go ahead. It made me no never mind because as soon as I walked around any corner, I was sure to find another asking to be my victim, lol!!!
Long story short, he smutted her out and went to be with his babymomma.
Be careful.
ETA: oh, and yeah, you should tell her.... thats what a friend would do instead of leaving her hanging.
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Last edited by Edls4; 07-06-2009 at 03:11 PM..
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Re: Friend issues
If he wants to talk to you go for it. I’m sure you feel special and that’s how a girl should feel.
Make sure you keep him interested make sure he’s not disappointed he chose you.
She didn’t have sex with him.
She pursued a guy that wanted you.
Enjoy it well it last I wouldn’t get caught up with him because I’m sure he’ll do the same to you sooner or later.
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Re: Friend issues
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalMouthDeon
I swear...this incog S/N on LSA is the most sleaziest, dumbest, whorish and trampish broad on this side hell...
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What you talkin' about, Willis?"

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Re: Friend issues
you are a TRUE FRIEND..I wish more females obeyed the code like you do. to answer your q i don't think he is worth creating tension between you two.i mean one might argue that he's fair game and technically they could be right but sometimes I think it is better to be "wrong" and keep a good friend than be right and start up some shit,
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Re: Friend issues
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Originally Posted by Askee
If he wants to talk to you go for it. I’m sure you feel special and that’s how a girl should feel.
Make sure you keep him interested make sure he’s not disappointed he chose you.
She didn’t have sex with him.
She pursued a guy that wanted you.
Enjoy it well it last I wouldn’t get caught up with him because I’m sure he’ll do the same to you sooner or later.
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LOL I don't feel special I feel perplexed. She's really not a close friend, she's someone I know through work but I still don't want to do anything to offend her and I don't know him well enough to know if he's worth pursuing and making waves in my friendship waters. Then again I dont want to miss out on getting to know someone that I'm attracted to and interested in knowing more about. I feel if I tell her she'll take it the wrong way. How do I go about saying uhhh dude said he's not interested in you but he wants to get to know me are you cool with that. Maybe it's just me but myself personally I'd be offended...
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Re: Friend issues
OP, he definitely likes you. The first question is, do you like him?
The second question is, if he doesn't like your friend, why did he take her number...to feed his ego.
Really handsome guys with swag like women who challenge them. They can have any woman they want, so they want a woman who they "can't have."
He probably liked you the first night, but when your friend came on to him like that, he just figured you were taken, not interested, or whatever.
Maybe you should tell your friend the truth. Obviously, she'll be hurt, but maybe in time, she will recover. This is a lesson to all women...don't chase a man, let him chase you
Also, he didn't have sex with her, and this is important. If he had slept with her, knowing you two were girls, I would look at him differently.
He was nice to her, but I think it's obvious from his behavior that he's not interested. And she should already see that.
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Re: Friend issues
F it I decided it's not worth it! He is sexy, wealthy, charming and has swagg on 10 million but certainly not worth all the drama it could potentially cause. I still kno how to go about tellin her he's not interested.
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Re: Friend issues
Quote:
Originally Posted by xBeckyx
you are a TRUE FRIEND..I wish more females obeyed the code like you do. to answer your q i don't think he is worth creating tension between you two.i mean one might argue that he's fair game and technically they could be right but sometimes I think it is better to be "wrong" and keep a good friend than be right and start up some shit,
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On one hand I agree with you, but on the other hand, what if he was "the one?"
I know a girl who took a guy to a formal black tie event. They weren't in a relationship, they actually went as friends. One of her friends was very attracted to him and he was interested in her, but the girl I know was also interested.
Long story short, he is now married to the girl he met at the Black Tie formal event.
I believe in loyalty. But sometimes, people take that stuff too far too. I've never gone out with a guy that one of my friends was interested in, but I would NEVER stand in the way of one of my friend's happiness, even if it hurt to watch. Because eventually, I'll get mine.
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Re: Friend issues
Quote:
Originally Posted by Toocoolforschoo
OP, he definitely likes you. The first question is, do you like him?
The second question is, if he doesn't like your friend, why did he take her number...to feed his ego.
Really handsome guys with swag like women who challenge them. They can have any woman they want, so they want a woman who they "can't have."
He probably liked you the first night, but when your friend came on to him like that, he just figured you were taken, not interested, or whatever.
Maybe you should tell your friend the truth. Obviously, she'll be hurt, but maybe in time, she will recover. This is a lesson to all women...don't chase a man, let him chase you
Also, he didn't have sex with her, and this is important. If he had slept with her, knowing you two were girls, I would look at him differently.
He was nice to her, but I think it's obvious from his behavior that he's not interested. And she should already see that.
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Yes I do like him but I don't want to step on her toes. Maybe later on down the road if the interest is still there I'll pursue it. Right now I just feel like it will be more drama then it's worth. I don't really know him but I do know her and I have to work with her everyday. Sometimes we as women handle things more emotionally then we need to and I don't want her upset with me and feeling bitter. So it's best I not even play this hand, lol. I'll communicate with him periodically but I'm not going to put myself in position where I could grow roots to him and stir the pot with her. I'll see where it goes after a while. I definitely wont go out with him when he's in town. Also, I don't want to be the one to tell her he's not interested I'm going to suggest to him that he does it.
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Re: Friend issues
Girl you better talk to that man you'll never forgive yourself.
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Re: Friend issues
If he's interested in you and you interested in him , I say go for it. It's not like he had relations with her.
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