Okay, it's not that harsh or simple. I'm an accomplished woman who'd been having a casual but monogamous relationship with a nice, good looking white guy for 4 months or so. By monogamous, I mean that neither of us is screwing anybody else. Dude found someone he could see more of a real relationship with--a white woman of course--and kept it moving. So did I. I was a bit hurt by this but glad he was honest with me instead of stringing me along or playing games. But needless to say that relationship didn't work out for him and they never got past a second date. (He told me about her before they went out on the first date.)

SO I just found out I was pregnant. I'm almost 40 and have a teenaged son I've raised on my own since birth. After having him I vowed I would NEVER have another child out of wedlock and went on to rebuild my life. I got a master's degree while he was in pre-school and now I'm working on a doctorate. I bought a house and took on a second freelance job that allowed me to give my son the finer things in life--travel abroad, expensive summer camps, tutors, etc.

I told "Ralph" I'm pregnant and he's more than willing to do the right thing by this child--even raise it on his own if he has to, but he said he won't marry me. Frankly, I don't want him to marry me. It would be an awkward arrangement for the sake of the baby. I also have my teen son to consider. BUT at the same time I don't want a child out of wedlock. But I have been wanting another baby forever. I just found Mr. Right and married--the only way I'd have a second child. I want this baby soooo badly but not like this. I'm considering ending the pregnancy but my heart is breaking. I can't believe I'm in this mess at my age.

I meant to say I NEVER found Mr. Right to marry. And that's the only way I would have another child.

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sounds like a mess.. sorry

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If you couldn't keep a vow to yourself - which only required practicing safe sex - then dude knows damn well you'll never keep a vow to him.

You slipped, were not careful, and now have found yourself in a big pile of shit. Good luck.

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The other consideration for me is the financial after the child is born. I know Ralph will support this child, put him/her on his insurance and everything else a father does, but I can't see him taking over my mortgage and bills while I stay home with the baby for a year or so. It's important to me to raise my own child. A lot of women on my job return to work mere weeks or months after have a child and leave the kids at daycare. They may work for them but I can't see myself doing it.

PS The reason I mentioned his race is because that is largely the reason he won't marry me I think.

were you suppose to be incog-negro ?

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so op got revealed and people still taking this thread seriously.

mofos needs lives.

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Actually, I did keep the vow to myself. My child is in high school. I haven't been pregnant in THAT many years. Now to turn darn near 40 and have this happen! And if I end this pregnancy, my chances at another full-term one will be even less than it is now with my age.

troll troll troll! Give it up

Am I just bored or is LSA extra entertaining this afternoon????

What does his race have anything to do with it? Would it be different if he was Blasian?

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A "reveal" doesn't make me a troll or mean that I'm not really going through this situation.