did u know he was not gonna be a good father before u got pregnant?
nope. hes my ex. we even talked about kids at one point. but we brokeup & started hooking up 3months later. then 5months after that i got pregnant & he bailed
just being realistic, you think a niggrum is gonna refer to a woman as his wex wife when talking to his boys? hell no. he will say "my babymama".... hell his friends will call her his babymama too. ppl with kids need to live their life! nobody is paying your bills so just don't pay bitter hoes no mind.
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Originally Posted by E=PC2 Pregnant with an engagement ring = babymoma until he makes it legal
have a child with a engagement ring = BABYMoma
You are a baby-moma because you are not legally married.
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Originally Posted by Audrey Kathleen
Divorced women with children can also be baby mamas. Not just people who had a child or children out of wedlock .
This is true for the widow or divorcee, which would be their title, should she go on to have children with a man or with men she is not married to. Her title for those births with those other men would be baby momma.
I'm one of those 'single' (not married) moms, but I'm not doing any of this singularly. lol
I'm actually afforded the opportunity to raise mine in the home. In that way--for people like myself who feel it's best--I'm in a better situation than a lot of married moms. (not tryna crap on anyone...not sure if that was op's intent.)
My main concern is the statistics b/c as an unwed black mother it's automatically assumed that I'm a single parent with no assistance whatsoever from my child's father....just the opposite is true.
So yep, I'm a proud 'baby mama' lol. We are well taken care of. And if we ever sign that certificate (as a divorcee marriage is the last thing on my list) I'll be a proud wife and mother and love my family just the same.
I was always under the impression that if you had children and you weren't married, you were a babymama (and let's get something straight - I HATE saying that shit. Cause you and I both know it's about the STIGMA behind it). The problem that I have with all these titles is that they are too cut and dry and yet complex. Gray area abounds.
If my husband dies, I'm a widower.
But if we had kids, I'm now a baby mama because he's dead and I'm left single with the children? WTF? Nonsense.
Most GROWN ASS MEN I know that have kids from their ex-wives refer to these women AS their ex-wives, when in the company of their friends. Should they just say eff it and call them baby mamas? For why? They were married. Now they're divorced. That is, traditionally and semantically, his EX WIFE.
This shit makes no sense.
And really, it reeks of devaluing children AND women. (IMO)
(And I REFUSE to call ANY CHILD a bastard. Sorry. Won't do it.)
I'm not judging ANYBODY - for any reason. One of my best friends has a kid - from a date rape situation. She kept the kid (against her beliefs to abort) - should I call her a baby mama? I just won't. Because WE ALL KNOW why and TO WHOM most folks throw that silly shit around for. It's not just semantics. There's nasty intent behind MOST folks that say it when it is said. And I can't abide by that.
I think it's a GREAT idea to be a wife. I am one - and it's cool.
But sometimes life goes askew. And wives become ex-wives. And they are better for it.
Or people choose motherhood over marriage. I have a cousin who is divorced and doesn't see another marriage on her horizon. But she LOVES kids and wants one of her own. She's set an age limit before she inseminates sans partner. Whose baby mama is she?
I do believe that a wife reward should be way higher and more stable then what a baby momma represents in this world.
A wife represents planning, understanding, positive choices, and commitment.
A baby’s mommas represent lack of judgment, lack of information when making a choice, instance gratification, and reckless intentions and lack of common sense.
Nothing in life just happens we all make choices and we all create our environment.
No child only wants to know and have a relationship with one parent because they need both despite your reasoning. It life not a doll and that life will grow up to speak for it self, it will make is own choices, and it will judge your choices
Yeah cause all marriages all peachy perfect and occur for the right reasons!
^ ^ ^ A husband can be as fucked up as fucked up can be. A wife can be as fucked up as a wife can be. Still, if they married, he is a husband, she is a wife -- just a fucked up one but nevertheless, they are still a husband and a wife.
Same thing with a baby momma -- she can be a star baby momma or she can be a degenerate -- her being a degenerate changes nothing, just like a fucked up husband changes nothing -- the girl is still a baby momma.
Interchangeably, ANY parent who is parenting alone (divorcee, widow, baby momma, baby daddy) can also be called (1) a single parent, (2) the child's mother or (3) the child's father. And, any parent reguardless of their relationship status can be referred to as a child's mother or the child's father.
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Last edited by C/L Cuspie; 04-20-2012 at 12:05 PM..
Now, if babyz mommaz have an issue with the title, instead of going into attack mode with mothers of other titles, why not begin tell the men (the babyz daddyz) to rescind the title they gave yall and start calling yall "my child's mother". And, you ladies do the same -- start calling your children's father "my child's father" instead of calling him your babyz daddyz.
There's so much anger surrounding the idea of a single mother it's amusing. Some of you need to relax. You're not raising the kid, why so much emotion? Hilarious.
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Re: Not all baby mothers are single moms
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Originally Posted by E=PC2
You are an IDIOT!!! An ex-wife has a legal right to claim the house, car and half of the father assets.
Most men don't have shit to claim in the event of the divorce... and it's usually the wife handling all the $quare biz, especially with black families.Average child support payment is $250, from ex-husbands
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A baby-moma can't claim shit but child support and a wet ass!!
She is a former wife that with legal kids.
A baby-moma is a chick with bastard kids. That the father didn't marry.
So children born in wedlock have birth certificates lined with gold? It takes a man to legitimize a child? says who? Are the wedlock'd children born with a special blood type that makes them immune to societal ills? I am sick to death of women giving men ALLLLL this power over them and their children's lives, then turn on their heels and shout to the heavens that women and children are at the bottom of the totem pole. As if life begins and ends with being legally bound to a walking/talking penis with no discretion. SMGDH. LMAO.
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Gettin n1ggaz heads right... one post at a time. Gon' learn t'day
The ONLY people "attacked" in this thread have been single mothers. It was one or two people's opinions that an ex wife is the same as a baby mama. That is not an attack. Whether anyone agrees or not with that fonts opinion it was not an attack on an ex wife. Audrey was not trying to throw shade or written with malice...she isn't even a mother! And even if she was why wasn't all that negativity directed at her instead of calling all single mothers hoes? And regardless of what a dictionary deems to be a correct term calling a child a bastard is plain ole mean and hurtful. But if that's what helps some people feel better about themselves. And if anyone did any research on the origins of the word "bastard" they'd learn the word is used incorrectly.
ITA with everything TwelveTwentyOne said! This thread just goes to show that a lot of people have ZERO respect for other people. You NEVER have to agree with with anyone about anything but I really don't understand the hatred some people show towards single mothers.
Last edited by GraciLuFreebush; 04-26-2012 at 12:33 PM..
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