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Heartbreak Hotel - The Lipstick Alley Relationship Forum Got man/woman problems? Cry on our shoulders, let us talk you through it! Got relatives that really need to be distant? Tell us, we understand! |
damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!First off, I'm a lil embarassed to post this because you'd think that by the time you're near mid-20's, you'd be past Myspace/Facebook/Twitter drama.* But I guess I'm not... so
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damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
First off, I'm a lil embarassed to post this because you'd think that by the time you're near mid-20's, you'd be past Myspace/Facebook/Twitter drama.* But I guess I'm not... so don't judge me!
Basically, me and my ex haven't talked to each other in about 3 months.* We went from best friends for 10 years, to relationship status, and I tried to downgrade it to friends again because we just weren't good as a couple.* He didn't like that and said if we couldn't be in a relationship then he wanted nothing to do with me.* He was very cold and insisted that he didn't have anything else to say to me, and that he couldn't be "just friends" with me.* It hurt because he was my best friend for years, but I slowly started to get past it and move on.
Anyway, last week I got one of those generic email invitation from Facebook saying he joined FB and invited me to join.* I know FB can go through your email contacts and hook you up with the people in your address book.* Since he had JUST signed up, I figured it was a just a mass invation he sent out and that he didn't realize he let FB send one to me as well.*
This past weekend I signed up for FB anyway because I had been meaning to for a while to promote a website I'm starting up.* Once I was logged in, it said I had 1 friend confirmation waiting (from the ex).* I knew it was probably done automatically from the invitation he sent out.* Still not knowing whether it was a mistake on his part or not, I ignored it.* Didn't confirm or deny, just left it alone and decided to wait and see what happens.* I had already embarassed myself enough by practically begging him to stay friends with me, so I was not about to accept it and embarass myself AGAIN and have him say it was a mistake.
I had only been on FB for a few days when I saw that he cancelled his friend request to me. So now I'm thinking A) He had just noticed I was a pending friend and realized he didn't mean to invite me so he cancelled it or B) He saw I didn't accept his request right away and got angry and cancelled it.
I said/did nothing, went on about my business. The next day (yesterday) I noticed that he changed the privacy settings on his page.* We're in the same "network"- before I could see everything on his profile, but now he has it set to where I can't see the messages people leave on his wall, or his friends list.*
I have a link to my website posted on my page.* I check the site statistics daily and I saw that he's been on it a total of 4 times in one night for a total of 16 minutes... and all it says right now is "Coming Soon."!
Okay, this is all over the place, so I'll wrap it up.* I guess I'm just trying to figure out if he's playing games, or if it really was a mistake that he invited me to FB and now wants to backtrack. It all sounds silly, but this was once a very true and dear friend to me, I feel betrayed by how easily he was able to drop me as a friend, and I'm just trying to interpret this recent behavior. Am I making something out of absolutely nothing?
Lawd forgive me for giving a damn about some Facebook drama and thank YOU for being understanding ;)
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
Posted this from my bberry, not sure why there are * s everywhere... My bad.
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really need a damn nap
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
why the hell are you using asterisks after every sentence... where are the footnotes
oh ok u should edit cuz its hard to read that way...
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PROUD WAG
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
I don't think FB can send friend requests to people in your address book. HE (your former friend) sent that friend request. You didn't reply and he got mad.
your post was too long so I don't know what else you asked, but I just wanted to clarify that one part.
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
well, i started on facebook back in 2004 and i value it as a platform to keep up with people that you don't care about enough to call but still want to know that they're doing well. so when i'm in my mid 20s i won't be ashamed to log in and keep up with my college friends.
now myspace & twitter
i have a twitter acct i refuse to update and i'm about to deactivate my myspace page since i rarely log on.
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
Oh, didn't know it was so hard to read... Nevermind =/ maybe ill edit it at a computer later... Thanks anyways lol
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
damn he really loves you huh? he sent you that message and when you didn't accept he saw it as a rejection. if i were you i would reach out to him and tell him the situation, see if it makes a difference to him. if not, i guess it hurts but you have to move on.
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
he's def. not over you, and since you were the one who decided to "downgrade" he feels totally rejected. . .on top of the fc friends request drama. . .
he wants to stay in contact with you, anyway he can without the obvious shown, hence the website hits and friends request. . .
dude is stuck, he cant move on nor have you. . .
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lani Alexander
well, i started on facebook back in 2004 and i value it as a platform to keep up with people that you don't care about enough to call but still want to know that they're doing well. so when i'm in my mid 20s i won't be ashamed to log in and keep up with my college friends. 
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
Quote:
Originally Posted by d nastii
Oh, didn't know it was so hard to read... Nevermind =/ maybe ill edit it at a computer later... Thanks anyways lol
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I didn't think it was that hard to read..I just saw astericks and kept reading. No big deal
Anywho, I guess he saw your login times after he sent the friend request and thought you didn't want to be bothered. I guess it hurt his feelings.
What do you want to do? Let him go or try to connect?
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
You are over thinking things.
He may or may not have canceled it coz of whatever reason. He clearly doesnt want you in his business if he has changed his privacy settings. Keep it moving.
How do you even know he has checked your site specifically unless you have his IP address or he needs to be logged in
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La la la,,,
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
Sounds like he requested you and got mad that you didn't accept him. I would just keep it moving you didn't accept him so why look at his page???
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
I believe I'm a little older than you so I'm going to give you a small piece of what I've learned. Digest it or throw it away.
Leave it alone. Once lovers can rarely ever be only friends, especially if one party didn't want the break up. Sure, a few do but those are as rare as the 50 year wedding anniversary. You don't want this to turn into an ugly situation. You even said that you two weren't good as a couple.
You'll have other, better friends. Let this friendship die.
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
Nini I didn't accept because I wanted to make sure it wasn't an accidental invite. I'm not a stalker, I don't know his IP (well, now I do). I was trying to figure out the program that analyzes the site visitors and there was one in Malibu, CA on a Mac computer with verizon service that kept accessing the site. That's him. Its not like I was hunting him down, I found out while I was working on my site. *sigh* anyway, thanks for the responses. Guess I'll let it be.
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Re: damn facebook and all the dramatics that come with it!
aww he stuck on you!!! BUt you said he youo guys aren't a good couple together.. Your best bet is to just move on. KNow that he is stuck on you and just want to know what you are up to... If you like it, feed in to it, If you don't like it, keep on trucking!!
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