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4 scholarships to 4 schools, help me choose

Selenadominates

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I have until May 1 to choose between 4 schools and I'm stressed the fµck out. Cost is not an issue in these decisions because I have scholarships to all of them and my financial aid pretty much covers everything else. Also, my parents are willing to take out loans if it comes to that but it won't.

School one: The second best school in my state. Just built a brand new department and building for the major I am going into with new and better equipment etc. I've been there many times. Only about an hour from home, I have an anxiety disorder so being close to home seems smart. This was one of my top choices. It also has a sizeable black population and I will probably know a lot of the students there from high school. I think it will be better for me to choose a roommate I know because of my anxiety disorder.

School two: also one of my top choices. A very good school for my major. One of the top ones in mass. (no it's not Harvard or MIT lmaoo). Only the next state over so not super far. Slightly better for my intended major than school one although they are pretty close. I am leaning towards this school only because of its slight advantage. I dont know anyone in mass tho which is scary.

School three: Worse than schools one and two. Probably a couple of hours away. I dont really see myself going to this school but I applied because my friend told me to.

School four: Its in the south, its expensive as hell but I was rewarded a scholarship from the math and science department. It's a good school but ranks pretty low for my intended major.

Honestly, it's between school one and two for me. My dad is kind of pressuring me to choose school one. I feel like I want to get the fµck out of this state but also school one has more pros than cons. School two has a slightly better academic ranking and many alumni say students have jobs lined up before they even graduate.
 

LazyDaisy

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School One seems like the obvious choice. Great reputation, new equipment, closer to home, black population, and familiar faces. None of the other options offer this many pros.
 

Sallie Blair

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I have until May 1 to choose between 4 schools and I'm stressed the fµck out. Cost is not an issue in these decisions because I have scholarships to all of them and my financial aid pretty much covers everything else. Also, my parents are willing to take out loans if it comes to that but it won't.

School one: The second best school in my state. Just built a brand new department and building for the major I am going into with new and better equipment etc. I've been there many times. Only about an hour from home, I have an anxiety disorder so being close to home seems smart. This was one of my top choices. It also has a sizeable black population and I will probably know a lot of the students there from high school. I think it will be better for me to choose a roommate I know because of my anxiety disorder.

School two: also one of my top choices. A very good school for my major. One of the top ones in mass. (no it's not Harvard or MIT lmaoo). Only the next state over so not super far. Slightly better for my intended major than school one although they are pretty close. I am leaning towards this school only because of its slight advantage. I dont know anyone in mass tho which is scary.

School three: Worse than schools one and two. Probably a couple of hours away. I dont really see myself going to this school but I applied because my friend told me to.

School four: Its in the south, its expensive as hell but I was rewarded a scholarship from the math and science department. It's a good school but ranks pretty low for my intended major.

Honestly, it's between school one and two for me. My dad is kind of pressuring me to choose school one. I feel like I want to get the fµck out of this state but also school one has more pros than cons. School two has a slightly better academic ranking and many alumni say students have jobs lined up before they even graduate.

All that matters is attending a college where you will enjoy your time, enjoy living there, and can maximize as many connections and opportunities as possible. As someone who also has an anxiety disorder, I will say that getting out of my comfort zone by moving was both scary and liberating. Also, I gradually learned to look at it this way: when you make friends in a brand new place, that's a new place to call "home"--when you go back, you'll have folks to chill with as opposed to being a tourist staying in a hotel. Because of this, I'd also try to find out where the majority of the students come from: school 1 sounds like a place where everyone from your town attends, so you might not meet people with networks outside of the area.
 

BoujeeBae

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School two.

Like you said, it has more advantage then school one.
 

Bonehilda

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Outside of your scholarships, is the financial aid that will cover the rest loans or grants? If it is loans, school one since it is in-state. If the financial aid is grants, school two.
 

Lotusmoon

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Which school has the faculty members you want to work with? School ranking is nice, but a recommendation letter from a prestigious name is even better. Of course, you need to know what your major will be, first. Also check out the social opportunities on campus. Visit both if you can.

Outside of your scholarships, is the financial aid that will cover the rest loans or grants? If it is loans, school one since it is in-state. If the financial aid is grants, school two.
^^^This is worth considering also.

CONGRATULATIONS! Well done- 4 scholarships is amazing!
 

Sly Kitty

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School two: also one of my top choices. A very good school for my major. One of the top ones in mass. (no it's not Harvard or MIT lmaoo). Only the next state over so not super far. Slightly better for my intended major than school one although they are pretty close. I am leaning towards this school only because of its slight advantage. I dont know anyone in mass tho which is scary.

This is my vote.

I have anxiety, like handshaking anxiety if I need to speak publicly. I went to undergrad in a state that I've never been to on a full ride scholarship. The confidence that I gained after my first couple of weeks was looking around at my peers and realized that they were just regular schmegular people like me. I figured out the people that were doing well in my major and kinda attached myself to them (lab partners, etc.).

Congrats on your academic excellence! You have options and any choice you make will be right for YOU!
 
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Tammyblue

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Congratulations OP, you will make the best decision for you. This is so great, black girl magic at it again, go on with your smart self:b72.
 

HannahO

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You know what, this isn't going to work for everyone but I have anxiety and I moved to a whole other country to go to University. I actively make myself uncomfortable by exposing myself to situations that make me uncomfortable. It's hard af it's not going to cure my anxiety but it helps me manage the symptoms better and have a chance to fight back the negative thoughts in my head "hey, i went cliff diving and i didn't die b!tch" or "yeah i moved countries made new friends still here b!tch". Also even if you have a roommate from HS that doesn't guarantee you're going to like living with them etc. Does your university provide for people with anxiety? Maybe they have a single room or that they can have roommate mixers or something? (Irdk how you guys do it in the U.S lol) Like is there a system where you can have like speed dating for room mates? If that's not a thing, somebody needs to make it a thing lmao.

Also don't feel forced to stay with people from HS because I'm going to be real, people CHANGE like a lot between the last year of secondary school to the second year of college.

Also try and stalk the students from uni number 2, there should be like social pages for them on insta/fb/tik tok whatever and try and scope if they have a good amount of black people if that's what you're worried about. Try and see what kind of societies they have as well.

Sometimes life requires us to get outside of our comfort zone once in a while.

Whichever you choose, just make sure its your choice and GOOOOOOOD LUCK!
 

Selenadominates

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Outside of your scholarships, is the financial aid that will cover the rest loans or grants? If it is loans, school one since it is in-state. If the financial aid is grants, school two.
I was offered both but I have not accepted the loans yet
 

rubyhikesamile

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I would choose the 2nd school. Sometimes new situations will help you push beyond the anxiety and not rely on family, who might unintentionally make it easier for you to rely on old anxious patterns.
 

Teigh

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I would do the following:

List all of them based on the actual cost of attending for the four years. You need to include the loans too.

Example:

School 1 - Total cost to attend (4 years)
total scholarship money
remaining cost - everything gets included here. EVERYTHING
Get net total for you to attend.

Do this for all four schools.

Then rank based on your major. which is better?

If these schools are equal in terms of what they will do for you career-wise then I would base it on the cost to attend.

What is your major?
 

Selenadominates

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I would do the following:

List all of them based on the actual cost of attending for the four years. You need to include the loans too.

Example:

School 1 - Total cost to attend (4 years)
total scholarship money
remaining cost - everything gets included here. EVERYTHING
Get net total for you to attend.

Do this for all four schools.

Then rank based on your major. which is better?

If these schools are equal in terms of what they will do for you career-wise then I would base it on the cost to attend.

What is your major?
My major is computer science. I'm definitely going to do this, I feel like its the only way i'll be able to come to a decision because I'm so indecisive
 

Teigh

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My major is computer science. I'm definitely going to do this, I feel like its the only way i'll be able to come to a decision because I'm so indecisive
I'm indecisive too. LMAO. That's why I always have to do something like that and go from there. It will help you see the big picture. Like I said, if all things are equal, then I would pick the cheaper route.

You have a good major so not sure if the school even matters.
 

HunniHot

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#1 and then #2. That said tho, going somewhere where you’re entirely unfamiliar could actually exacerbate your problematic anxiety. Also, remember that you are the prize, not the instituition you choose to attend. You are the prestige, not the degree.

That said, make the best financial and mentally beneficial decision. Pick the less costly one close to (but not right next to) home so you can visit if need be. You can spread your wings or whatever when you pursue higher education or choose where you want to start your career.

Hope this helps. Congrats.
 

AgnesGooch

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One thing you didn't mention was school size. IMO going to a small school can be better for anxiety. I feel like if I went to a big state school I probably would have gotten lost in the crowd and dropped out. But I was able to get individual attention from administrators/academics whenever things got overwhelming. At least they knew who I was.
 

AgnesGooch

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I would choose the 2nd school. Sometimes new situations will help you push beyond the anxiety and not rely on family, who might unintentionally make it easier for you to rely on old anxious patterns.

I was thinking the same. Being at a school where you are constantly running into people from high school would be weird imo. Like you can't start afresh. You have to be the person you were in HS. Just my opinion.
 

Auntie Social

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I have until May 1 to choose between 4 schools and I'm stressed the fµck out. Cost is not an issue in these decisions because I have scholarships to all of them and my financial aid pretty much covers everything else. Also, my parents are willing to take out loans if it comes to that but it won't.

School one: The second best school in my state. Just built a brand new department and building for the major I am going into with new and better equipment etc. I've been there many times. Only about an hour from home, I have an anxiety disorder so being close to home seems smart. This was one of my top choices. It also has a sizeable black population and I will probably know a lot of the students there from high school. I think it will be better for me to choose a roommate I know because of my anxiety disorder.

School two: also one of my top choices. A very good school for my major. One of the top ones in mass. (no it's not Harvard or MIT lmaoo). Only the next state over so not super far. Slightly better for my intended major than school one although they are pretty close. I am leaning towards this school only because of its slight advantage. I dont know anyone in mass tho which is scary.

School three: Worse than schools one and two. Probably a couple of hours away. I dont really see myself going to this school but I applied because my friend told me to.

School four: Its in the south, its expensive as hell but I was rewarded a scholarship from the math and science department. It's a good school but ranks pretty low for my intended major.

Honestly, it's between school one and two for me. My dad is kind of pressuring me to choose school one. I feel like I want to get the fµck out of this state but also school one has more pros than cons. School two has a slightly better academic ranking and many alumni say students have jobs lined up before they even graduate.
Congratulations!
I would say school 2, to gain a different perspective by living in a different state. I was extremely shy with social anxiety but chose to go to a college in another state where I didn’t know anyone and it was the best thing for me.
 

Shy Vy

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What'd you choose op? Don't leave us hanging lol

giphy.gif
 

girlyteengirl

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i dont know about which one you should pick, but i wanted to say that moving away from home tremendously helped my social anxiety. i still have a hard time with groups, but im living life without hiding now (literally). i cried on my first day of college, and i hated the anxiety that came with being by myself for the first time. yet, as i got comfortable tending to myself through exposure therapy (didnt even mean to, really), i cant even imagine living at home

...just a thought. good luck on ur decision!
 

Cryeisha

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i dont know about which one you should pick, but i wanted to say that moving away from home tremendously helped my social anxiety. i still have a hard time with groups, but im living life without hiding now (literally). i cried on my first day of college, and i hated the anxiety that came with being by myself for the first time. yet, as i got comfortable tending to myself through exposure therapy (didnt even mean to, really), i cant even imagine living at home

...just a thought. good luck on ur decision!
The one hour drive should be enough to “troubleshoot” anxiety (I don’t know how to resolve this issue personally and I deal with it; it never left me even when I change environments), there’s still a lot of new people and new environments without drastically changing everything which might be too much, especially when it comes to college. Home is always there and OP will be available to attend family functions (which is a big deal at times).
 

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