Changing jobs like underwear

SungQueen's B*tch
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
247,145
Reactions
1,520,111 186,079 117,845
Alleybux
109,114,351
I am unable to keep a job. The longest job I've had was 1 year and that was only because my boss liked me.

All my other jobs, I either can't do the work quickly/efficiently enough, or my colleagues snitch on me to management.

It's really starting to depress me, how incompetent I am. I try so hard to be friendly and keep my head down, yet I still manage to ruin my opportunities.

I got reprimanded by my boss after some colleagues complained about me and now I'm weighing if I should even continue working there. I'd rather quit than get fired.

I deal with anxiety, memory issues and can be absent minded. I do know I'm the problem.

I just wish I could excel at something.

Being a failure really sucks.
 
Blowin’ (Cash) in the Wind
Joined
Jun 11, 2019
Messages
184
Reactions
2,338 51 5
Alleybux
43,312
Just curious??

What's ya moon and Mars??

Or are you an air sun?
I honestly don’t think this is the context to be asking about astrological placements. I love astrology as much as anyone, but it’s sort of insensitive and makes other Astro enthusiasts look bad imo
@ OP, I second the recommendation to look into the root of your anxiety because it may be causing you to self sabotage at work.
 
Active Member
Joined
Nov 24, 2020
Messages
232
Reactions
577 61 201
Alleybux
35,213
I honestly don’t think this is the context to be asking about astrological placements. I love astrology as much as anyone, but it’s sort of insensitive and makes other Astro enthusiasts look bad imo
@ OP, I second the recommendation to look into the root of your anxiety because it may be causing you to self sabotage at work.

I wanted to know if you have some placements as me because I have the same problem..

I apologize and hope for the best
 
SungQueen's B*tch
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
247,145
Reactions
1,520,111 186,079 117,845
Alleybux
109,114,351
Are you working now? Have you tried seeking out help for you anxiety and memory issues?
yes I am working. I am debating whether to stay or not because my co workers have an issue with me. I don't think I can work in an environment where people are smiling and acting friendly towards me while going behind my back to get me in trouble with my boss. It's hard to not look at them as snakes.

I had been taking medication for anxiety but I have to refill my prescription. I don't know if there's anything I can do about my memory issues. It's pretty bad I can barely remember my childhood or recent conversations.
 
SungQueen's B*tch
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
247,145
Reactions
1,520,111 186,079 117,845
Alleybux
109,114,351
I honestly don’t think this is the context to be asking about astrological placements. I love astrology as much as anyone, but it’s sort of insensitive and makes other Astro enthusiasts look bad imo
@ OP, I second the recommendation to look into the root of your anxiety because it may be causing you to self sabotage at work.
Hi thank you. I don't personally subscribe to astrology but I have no issue with people who believe in it. If I am self sabotaging it is totally unconscious. I want nothing more than to be successful and make my family proud. That is why I am so depressed that I haven't been able to accomplish much.

I wish there was a magic pill to fix my issues.

@Bootz2 No need to apologize I know you meant well.
 
EyeWishUHeaven333
Joined
Apr 16, 2012
Messages
11,594
Reactions
33,201 207 71
Alleybux
229,630
yes I am working. I am debating whether to stay or not because my co workers have an issue with me. I don't think I can work in an environment where people are smiling and acting friendly towards me while going behind my back to get me in trouble with my boss. It's hard to not look at them as snakes.

I had been taking medication for anxiety but I have to refill my prescription. I don't know if there's anything I can do about my memory issues. It's pretty bad I can barely remember my childhood or recent conversations.
Dealing with fake people is draining. Maybe you can find a remote job in your field or an area you're interested in? Or take some time off (if you can financially) and go to school and study an area of interest?
 
SungQueen's B*tch
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
247,145
Reactions
1,520,111 186,079 117,845
Alleybux
109,114,351
I was like u OP then I started to wfh and still did not like it so then I started my own remote business and I am way more happier. I am overcoming anxiety and depression. Please try to get a remote job or see if you can take some time off. I doubt u can take time off so try wfh/remote work.
 
Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 7, 2012
Messages
8,030
Reactions
43,591 792 987
Alleybux
86,535
Why do your colleagues have a problem with you? Are you a team player? In my experience I found that even if you’re not the best employee but have a good rapport with your colleagues they’ll vouch for you.
 
Well-Known Member
Joined
Feb 26, 2012
Messages
32,171
Reactions
101,917 2,866 841
Alleybux
413,641
Do you work in office or what? I work from home permanently and I love my job and much efficient. It helped my mental health so much. It’s hard dealing with toxic work environments.
 
Active Member
Joined
Mar 10, 2021
Messages
199
Reactions
442 37 24
Alleybux
71,336
Are you sleeping well? Eating well? I know those are cliche things, but they help tremendously especially with memory loss. How old are you? In all honesty you sound like you just want to do what you want to do. If it were something you enjoyed you'd probably excel in it; that's how majority of people operate. Gut & butt health are wealth.
 
Well-Known Member
Joined
Apr 16, 2017
Messages
2,198
Reactions
12,547 356 449
Alleybux
210,136
yes I am working. I am debating whether to stay or not because my co workers have an issue with me. I don't think I can work in an environment where people are smiling and acting friendly towards me while going behind my back to get me in trouble with my boss. It's hard to not look at them as snakes.

I had been taking medication for anxiety but I have to refill my prescription. I don't know if there's anything I can do about my memory issues. It's pretty bad I can barely remember my childhood or recent conversations.

I used to have this issue and I dont have it as severe. But I get affected by my invoirment and take in the energy around me bad as good. I'm also at a similar place. Change if its impossible to stay but you would never get rid of fake colleges at a new place, even though some workplaces are better than others. They're everywhere and usually bosses fave. Just be polite back without engaging or putting in to much effort. Don't take it personal. Being fake is normal to many. Remember though to stay true to yourself.
About the memory, write down everything even the simplest thing. I write down everything and go back to my notes until it remains in my memory, because it will in the end.

I dont know about your background but my childhood affected me and how I interact and communicate and build relationships. My memory even got effected. Also how I receive criticism, negative as positive. My parents were narcissists and scarred me emotionally.
I grew up around very negative people. I was told everyday how useless I was. The expectations were so high that I failed everytime. Everything good I did was turned into something negative and the bad was highlighted and repeated. This would even be done around guests, uncles, aunties cousins and grandparents to humiliate me. If someone said something good about me, it got erased.

I saw people I worked with as my child hood surroundings (didn't know that though). The expectation I had for myself were unachievable like those in my childhood. Authorities were my parents and I would got anxiety when a boss came behind me, passed by or just wanted to talk to me. I never knew what to expect but I convinced myself that it would always be negative.

Once I realised how my childhood played a role in my adulthood relationship I had to breake the negative cycle, (it took years).

I discovered that my anxiety came from my childhood experiences and the emotions and trying to oppress feeling those emotions again. Find out where yours come from and try to work on it. I also tried taking prescription but it never got to the rote of my issues, only helped superficially and gave me side effects.
Also check so you don't have any kind of mentally condition, doesn't sound like it.

I take my vitamins also so I don't create an imbalance in my system where I lack something that in the end leads to anxiety.
B vitamins, magnesium and D vitamins saved my mental health, keeps my emotions in check, helps my memory, also get enough sleep.

Good Luck!
 
Well-Known Member
Joined
Jul 24, 2017
Messages
1,098
Reactions
11,762 92 34
Alleybux
241,353
if youve been advised by your Dr. to best manage your anxiety through prescription medication, why haven't you filled the script? Anxiety, as any moderate to severe mental diagnosis, can affect your understanding and memory. Also maybe seek help from a state vocational case work!er. Don't just lose your job without exhausting all resources because all skilled work requires you to be productive and have get along with other people. Good luck Op.
 
Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 2, 2009
Messages
24,586
Reactions
62,165 205 99
Alleybux
168,184
Look into therapy and a life coach. Seriously.

I was the same but then again I am in a high stress and pressured field of social work. So high turn over is not uncommon. Most of the time I would leave not do to my coworkers or bosses. I had great people to work with. It was due to low pay. I was not gonna stay anywhere that wasn't going to recognize my worth. After 18 months if you wasnt going to give me a slight raise or at least a good promotion or lateral move to do something that challenged me I was gone.

But covid put things more in perspective regarding my tolerance level for things and sticking around. Like at this current job. Been there 1 year and its not the end all. I want to do other things. But for now... I can see myself staying another year and planning for what I really wanna do in that year.

I am working with a therapist and hope to get a short term life coach to help me reidentify my passion for my career or change directions slightly.
 
Pro BW
Joined
Oct 10, 2013
Messages
13,625
Reactions
79,961 2,854 2,730
Alleybux
129,472
What kind of industries do you work in? Being ratted out by coworkers is a hell of a pattern to have throughout your career.

It sounds like you need a job that's low in focus. Have you tried retail? I think a clothing store/dept would do wonders. The repetitive folding can be therapeutic, no focus required.
 
Well-Known Member
Joined
Feb 26, 2019
Messages
11,379
Reactions
54,171 789 740
Alleybux
100,604
I am unable to keep a job. The longest job I've had was 1 year and that was only because my boss liked me.

All my other jobs, I either can't do the work quickly/efficiently enough, or my colleagues snitch on me to management.

It's really starting to depress me, how incompetent I am. I try so hard to be friendly and keep my head down, yet I still manage to ruin my opportunities.

I got reprimanded by my boss after some colleagues complained about me and now I'm weighing if I should even continue working there. I'd rather quit than get fired.

I deal with anxiety, memory issues and can be absent minded. I do know I'm the problem.

I just wish I could excel at something.

Being a failure really sucks.
Get fired and collect unemployment! That is if you have been there for more than 6 months. YMMV, check with your state’s regulations.

Honestly do it this way...especially now. There may be other resources to help you get an actual career rather than a job. You may also get a counselor or someone who can help you get into soemmthing that you kind of like, where you can excel. Sometimes it is a matter not liking the work that you do, as opposed to being a ‘failure’. If you find some fun in something it might be better. Even if it’s that you like the people.
 
SungQueen's B*tch
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
247,145
Reactions
1,520,111 186,079 117,845
Alleybux
109,114,351
Is it generalized anxiety you have or another kind?
OCD and general anxiety.

Also, you not being able to remember your childhood may be a sign of trauma
I do remember being a crying toddler...like I was depressed all the time but I've had a good childhood for the most part? I even considered doing hypnosis to see if it can force me to remember the past.
 
Well-Known Member
Joined
May 26, 2017
Messages
1,403
Reactions
10,611 257 147
Alleybux
68,755
I am unable to keep a job. The longest job I've had was 1 year and that was only because my boss liked me.

All my other jobs, I either can't do the work quickly/efficiently enough, or my colleagues snitch on me to management.

It's really starting to depress me, how incompetent I am. I try so hard to be friendly and keep my head down, yet I still manage to ruin my opportunities.

I got reprimanded by my boss after some colleagues complained about me and now I'm weighing if I should even continue working there. I'd rather quit than get fired.

I deal with anxiety, memory issues and can be absent minded. I do know I'm the problem.

I just wish I could excel at something.

Being a failure really sucks.
OP are you working in an office or in a more customer facing role like retail? You don’t have to say exactly what you do but can we get a general feel for what type of work you’re in?
 
SungQueen's B*tch
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
247,145
Reactions
1,520,111 186,079 117,845
Alleybux
109,114,351
Why do your colleagues have a problem with you? Are you a team player? In my experience I found that even if you’re not the best employee but have a good rapport with your colleagues they’ll vouch for you.
I was told I'm not being a team player. In hindsight I should've just made the extra effort to do my part even though I was mentally exhausted. I think what I found jarring is that the colleague who snitched is someone who had always acted friendly to me. I don't even want to talk to them anymore but if I ignore them, I'm sure I'll be accused of being difficult and cause even more problems for myself.
 
SungQueen's B*tch
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
247,145
Reactions
1,520,111 186,079 117,845
Alleybux
109,114,351
Just be polite back without engaging or putting in to much effort. Don't take it personal. Being fake is normal to many. Remember though to stay true to yourself.
Thank you. I know I have to work on taking things personally but I have BPD so I end up looking at people as either awesome or awful depending how they treat me.

Once I realised how my childhood played a role in my adulthood relationship I had to breake the negative cycle
I'm glad you were able to overcome it. I think my mind is blocking my memories because I used to be an asshole as a kid (wasn't a bully or anything but used to look down on others) and I haven't been able to forgive myself for that. I sometimes wonder if my problems are karma for how I used to behave.
 
Well-Known Member
Joined
Apr 16, 2017
Messages
2,198
Reactions
12,547 356 449
Alleybux
210,136
Thank you. I know I have to work on taking things personally but I have BPD so I end up looking at people as either awesome or awful depending how they treat me.


I'm glad you were able to overcome it. I think my mind is blocking my memories because I used to be an asshole as a kid (wasn't a bully or anything but used to look down on others) and I haven't been able to forgive myself for that. I sometimes wonder if my problems are karma for how I used to behave.

I'm wondering that about my self (ha, ha). It has been challenging.
I believe sometimes it's karma but also a wake up call that something needs to change in life.
Forgive yourself and try to block negative energy from others, especially those you know by now are difficult.

Stayed blessed!
 
Sa Ka Fet
Joined
Feb 27, 2018
Messages
2,910
Reactions
11,517 232 74
Alleybux
308,631
OCD and general anxiety.


I do remember being a crying toddler...like I was depressed all the time but I've had a good childhood for the most part? I even considered doing hypnosis to see if it can force me to remember the past.
I used to have really bad OCD. Is yours based solely on intrusive thoughts or does it include behaviours as well (e.g. always checking if doors are locked).

There are threads on here about OCD, I have even made some threads of my own. They might help you
 
Sa Ka Fet
Joined
Feb 27, 2018
Messages
2,910
Reactions
11,517 232 74
Alleybux
308,631
OCD and general anxiety.


I do remember being a crying toddler...like I was depressed all the time but I've had a good childhood for the most part? I even considered doing hypnosis to see if it can force me to remember the past.
Oh ok. Well anxiety can cause memory loss so that could be what is happening with you.

You can definitely overcome it though. I did
 
Sa Ka Fet
Joined
Feb 27, 2018
Messages
2,910
Reactions
11,517 232 74
Alleybux
308,631
This is a thread on dealing with anxiety, including OCD

 
Well-Known Member
Joined
Dec 21, 2017
Messages
1,650
Reactions
6,615 61 41
Alleybux
180,195
If you're having issues with memory, maybe you can bring a notepad and write down what needs to be done that day. Be polite to coworkers, but you don't have to be friendsorfriendlywith them. You've stated you haven't been at the job long so it makes me wonder if their expectations are too high as you're still new and adjusting.
 

The Culture

The Lounge

General Alley

Recent Posts

  • Sticky
The Clubhouse App Official Discussion Thread
He’s mixed but his dad is yt so in my eyes he’s Yt. He’s an absolute racist when he gets upset I’m sure his dad is one too Exactly
The Pedro Pascal Appreciation, Tea and Thirst Thread
Did anyone see the interview that dave filoni gave on gma. he literally said everything and nothing in that interview especially when it came to...
Why Model Shanina Shaik Swears by Skinceuticals C E Feurilic Serum #IWokeUpLikeThis
I'm using it right now and my skin was glowy but it's even better ( I think it's thanks to P50 from Biologique Recherche too) . It's really the goat.
Hit the Floor
Well she getting movies left and right and praise so she can act now.
  • Poll
Harry Potter: Older Wizards Stan Poll
I say we have to take a sip from the Goblet of Hennessy every time somebody calls Snape an incel in this thread. Harry, did you call Snape an...
UPDATE Reddit Users Are LEGALLY Gaming The Stock Market...
What makes this image a honeypot? Is it the formation of the graph or the amounts? I found these definitions but can't relate them to the images...
Plus Size Shay
ok what happen yesterday with Barbie n shay live yesterday smh. Jay said that she and Barbie was f*****g and that's why Shay came home a day...
What's HOT and what's NOT in these Crypto Coin Streets?
Sitting. So glad I found this thread since I was about to buy dogecoin earlier today....
Ariana Grande appreciation/discussion/tea thread
People are posting this on ATRL. No idea if it's true or not, but could be one of those "many" collabs people keep talking about. I would love...
Top Bottom