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high school alley: friends with benefits

CallmeQueenB

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:disdain:
--
guys i'm not actually in high school. i'm in college. i'm 18
---

if a guy loves being around you, you make him laugh, he texts and calls you all the time, etc but says he does not want a relationship and only wants to be friends with benefits, what does this mean?

i'm on an emotional roller coaster. should i stay or should i go...i battle between letting him go completely and staying because i'd rather be FWB than nothing at all since i like him so much...but deep down i know this is not what i want. i need someone that will proudly claim me because quite frankly, i'm a catch. not even gonna lie...i'd be the perfect girlfriend seriously. my mom says :stop: i shouldn't let anyone milk the cow for free .

he has me soooooo deep in my feelings the dumbest sheeit makes me cry...earlier i was singing wrecking ball and tell me why the tears came tummbllinngg down my face. i mean damn, i barely ever cry but lately i've been crying so much. this is ridiculous and it has gotta stop. i've gotta end it...right? not only do i not want to let him go but i dread the 'moving on' process. ugh. it's gonna take me monnthhss. months of crying and heartbreak songs before i completely move on. anybody have any FWB stories to share? :love-over:

why-don-t-you-love-me-o.gif



and this is my 3rd topic on this dude...nobody approves of him LOL. my mom literally begged me to date anyone but him...my sisters said he ain't sheeit...my friend recently told me i was too pretty for him...they ain't neva lied. but for some reason i still like him, i can't help it.
 

MeekandWild

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OH GOD!! You're in High School:bulgy-eyes:? How many high schooler's we have on LSA?
 

Ashley Del Rey

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he wants the puss. that's all. you gave your power away too quickly (puss). tell him you want a relationship. if he can't give that to you, say sayanara & leave. find someone who wants to claim you openly.



ETA: & i hope you're joking when you say you're in high school. if you are, you need to be somewhere with your head in a book!
 

stubborn

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"high school friends with benefits"?
High schoolers shouldn't be having "friends with benefits". They shouldn't even be having xes unless they're at least 18(or a graduating senior) or out of their parents house imo.
Y'all are always trying to be grown.
 

KimberlyWest

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Girl I'm experiencing something similar.

Except he really does not give a fµck about me.

I am like beginning to hate him now and am thinking of ways to get my revenge for him treating me like trash.

the-grinch-grin.gif
 

Jordan Belfort

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I swear, I've never had this much drama when I was in HS. I didn't even skip class I see I've missed out.
 

ImInYourFace

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and this is my 3rd topic on this dude...nobody approves of him LOL. my mom literally begged me to date anyone but him...my sisters said he ain't sheeit...my friend recently told me i was too pretty for him...they ain't neva lied. but for some reason i still like him, i can't help it.

So why don't you actually listen to them?
 

NickiThePanda

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What the hell? :laugh: I'm assuming you're a junior/senior. When I was a junior/senior, I wasn't stuck on any dudes. If we wasn't on the same page then I told they ass BYE! You're going to meet plenty of other dudes so why are you worried about one horny little boy?
ETA: How long have you known this boy? You're sitting over there crying about him while he doesn't give two fvcks about you. He's just trying to get his dick wet.
 

Anna Banana

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Have SAT benefits. Have extracurricular benefits. Have top 5 university benefits. At least have birth control benefits or you'll have baby at 17 benefits.

Lord these chirrrren.
 

CallmeQueenB

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OH GOD!! You're in High School:bulgy-eyes:? How many high schooler's we have on LSA?

i'm a freshman in college, but i'm 18. it's kind of a joke. in my old topics because they sounded so childish people would comment that it was 'high school alley'. get it. like lipstick alley

smile.gif
 

ImInYourFace

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i'm a freshman in college, but i'm 18. it's kind of a joke. in my old topics because they sounded so childish people would comment that it was 'high school alley'. get it. like lipstick alley

smile.gif

Oh he's a college dude? Yea you're just a vagina to him. Move on.
 

MuffyCrosswire

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LEAVE HIM ALONE. Until you can learn to fµck him and hang with him and not catch feelings you will only be hurt and doing damage to yourself. You'll get fed up eventually though.
 

CallmeQueenB

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Girl I'm experiencing something similar.

Except he really does not give a eff about me.

I am like beginning to hate him now and am thinking of ways to get my revenge for him treating me like trash.

the-grinch-grin.gif

awww :/
that's exactly why i have to end this now, so i don't end up hating him like you hate your boo LOL.

gurl we deserve better....
 

AshMcLovin

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Oh my. Honey, leave him alone, you know that you don't want a FWB situation but he does so what reason is there to stay ? Yes you may have to cry and get everything out before getting over him but that's better than being in a situation that you clearly don't wanna be in, there a plenty of guys who would who would be proud to show you off, cut your losses and move on.
 

GoofballJamal

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Yeah, this likely won't end well for you OP. In fact 99% of the time, you won't get a legit relationship out of the *****. I was part of the 1% that managed to make that sh!t happen with mines, but a lot of drama and bµllsh!t preceded our relationship as bf/gf.

Save yourself some time and move on. You're in college after all, so I'm sure you can bag a cuter guy.
 
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are you seriously asking this? where is your self respect? are you really willing to give him what he wants while hes not trying to give you a damn thing in return? your body is not a toy for him to play around with when he wants to. trust me, his "friendship" aint worth allat. and if you do go along with what he wants I promise you that you will end up hurt. you can do soo much better than that.
 

CallmeQueenB

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So why don't you actually listen to them?

i wish it was that easy!!

my mind is telling me no but my heart is telling me yes
Reaction_-_Pout_Quote_1.gif


even though he ain't sh!t, i looked past that because those things aren't really important to me. i was willing to love him regardless...he's gonna miss me when i'm gone :disapointed:


What the hell? :laugh: I'm assuming you're a junior/senior. When I was a junior/senior, I wasn't stuck on any dudes. If we wasn't on the same page then I told they ass BYE! You're going to meet plenty of other dudes so why are you worried about one horny little boy?
ETA: How long have you known this boy? You're sitting over there crying about him while he doesn't give two fvcks about you. He's just trying to get his dick wet.

i've known him for 4 years.... he's a family friend and best friends with my brother...which that's kind of deteriorating because my brother has been acting weird lately. he does care about me though, he just doesn't want a relationship.
 

scott free

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should i stay or should i go...
This is why it is called high school alley. You aren't in a relationship. You are just liking a dude. Stop thinking you grown and doing thangs. You are feeling some feelings and think the whole world done changed.
 

IConfess

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:disdain:

if a guy loves being around you, you make him laugh, he texts and calls you all the time, etc but says he does not want a relationship and only wants to be friends with benefits, what does this mean?

It means exactly what he says. He is not interested in a relationship with you, and he only wants xes.

Don't get stuck in this trap because I have seen it too many times before. You keep convincing yourself that he wants more because he calls you and spends time with you- but really that is not the case. He is not going to change his mind. Once he finds someone he wants to be with, he will be with her and claim her and you will be left feeling bitter and looking stupid.

And on top of that, he'll still try to be "friends" with you while you pretend that nothing ever happened between you all.

You deserve better than that. Do not let this man drain your energy. Do not let this man have access to all your emotions that you should be saving for someone who is worthy.

Don't talk to him about it. There is no need to have a FWB "break up call'. There is nothing else to say. Just stop talking to him, build your strength up, and keep it moving.
 

CallmeQueenB

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Yeah, this likely won't end well for you OP. In fact 99% of the time, you won't get a legit relationship out of the *****. I was part of the 1% that managed to make that sheeit happen with mines, but a lot of drama and bullsheeit preceded our relationship as bf/gf.

Save yourself some time and move on. You're in college after all, so I'm sure you can bag a cuter guy.

how did it happen eventually for you?
Have SAT benefits. Have extracurricular benefits. Have top 5 university benefits. At least have birth control benefits or you'll have baby at 17 benefits.

Lord these chirrrren.

i'm already in college and i'm 18

you tried that hunneeyyyy
 

Anna Banana

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Well why would you up high school?

You know what, nevermind. Just get or stay on birth control.

how did it happen eventually for you?


i'm already in college and i'm 18

you tried that hunneeyyyy
 

CallmeQueenB

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LEAVE HIM ALONE. Until you can learn to eff him and hang with him and not catch feelings you will only be hurt and doing damage to yourself. You'll get fed up eventually though.

thanks manny.

i'm gonna cut it off, i just wanted some endearing words from my LSA family but that didn't really work out...instead i'm getting insulted and R-E-A-D for dear life
12-Kandi-Eye-Roll.gif


it started off fine...not catching feelings...but that did not last for long.
 

NickiThePanda

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i've known him for 4 years.... he's a family friend and best friends with my brother...which that's kind of deteriorating because my brother has been acting weird lately. he does care about me though, he just doesn't want a relationship.

Bish you really had me thinking you was a high schooler. I wrote that paragraph for nothing but some of those points still stand. I was in a situation like this a little while ago. He said that he cared about me but he wasn't ready for a relationship. He wanted to hoe around so I just cut him off. Yeah, it hurt a little bit b/c I really liked him but it was the best thing for me to do.
 

CallmeQueenB

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This is why it is called high school alley. You aren't in a relationship. You are just liking a dude. Stop thinking you grown and doing thangs. You are feeling some feelings and think the whole world done changed.


why do people keep trying to dismiss my emotions just because i'm young :stop:
like damn. i have a heart just like any 20 or 30 year old woman out there. i don't think i'm grown. it's just how i feel. it is what it is. and although i still live at home, i do pay some of my own bills with my own money from my own job thank you very much
1iHJlfW
 

scott free

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why do people keep trying to dismiss my emotions just because i'm young :stop:
like damn. i have a heart just like any 20 or 30 year old woman out there. i don't think i'm grown. it's just how i feel. it is what it is. and although i still live at home, i do pay some of my own bills with my own money from my own job thank you very much
1iHJlfW

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-3Iq3XQkAw"]Toilet Flush - YouTube[/ame]
 

CallmeQueenB

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It means exactly what he says. He is not interested in a relationship with you, and he only wants xes.

Don't get stuck in this trap because I have seen it too many times before. You keep convincing yourself that he wants more because he calls you and spends time with you- but really that is not the case. He is not going to change his mind. Once he finds someone he wants to be with, he will be with her and claim her and you will be left feeling bitter and looking stupid.

And on top of that, he'll still try to be "friends" with you while you pretend that nothing ever happened between you all.

You deserve better than that. Do not let this man drain your energy. Do not let this man have access to all your emotions that you should be saving for someone who is worthy.

Don't talk to him about it. There is no need to have a FWB "break up call'. There is nothing else to say. Just stop talking to him, build your strength up, and keep it moving.

your post made me a little emotional tbh
tumblr_m0y6lpbWvI1r4ina5o1_500.gif


see i told ya'll i've been crying too damn much. common sense already tells me all this, but i guess i needed to hear it again. the day he finally gets a girlfriend...boy that's gonna be hard. but i'll hopefully be completely over him by then.

i've always been so confident, but with him sometimes i feel inferior just because i keep thinking, am i not good enough?? maybe if i was prettier he'd wanna date me...stuff like that. and that's just not gonna work. because in actuality i'm too good for him, everyone tells me so, and deep down i know it's true.
 

GoofballJamal

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how did it happen eventually for you?

We were freshman too. After a year and a half of fighting, breaking off our FWB, and reestablishing the sh!t, he went off to study abroad for a semester. The three months he was gone, we got super close because we talked on the phone every night until 6 AM. When he came back in town, we kicked it every day and then he asked me to be his girl.

Our relationships was tumultuous, but we had killer, earth shattering xes that drew up back to each other. We'd be together for 10 or so months, break up, and then go through the cycle again.

So in short- it wastes a lot of time. I mean, I'm glad I got him, but it drained a lot of my energy. I wouldn't suggest you do the same, girl.
 

nevershoutnever

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Walk away. It'll save you the heartbreak in the future. Friends with benefits work best when you don't want to be in a relationship with the other person.
 

KimberlyWest

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awww :/
that's exactly why i have to end this now, so i don't end up hating him like you hate your boo LOL.

gurl we deserve better....

That ***** is not my "boo". Never was.

It was supposed to be a friends thing but he's too disrespectful for tastes.
 

NixyOsoFair

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i wish it was that easy!!

my mind is telling me no but my heart is telling me yes
Reaction_-_Pout_Quote_1.gif


even though he ain't sh!t, i looked past that because those things aren't really important to me. i was willing to love him regardless...he's gonna miss me when i'm gone :disapointed:




i've known him for 4 years.... he's a family friend and best friends with my brother...which that's kind of deteriorating because my brother has been acting weird lately. he does care about me though, he just doesn't want a relationship.

He's not though....

50900-Ellen-Page-shrug-gif-Tb30.gif
 

CallmeQueenB

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Bish you really had me thinking you was a high schooler. I wrote that paragraph for nothing but some of those points still stand. I was in a situation like this a little while ago. He said that he cared about me but he wasn't ready for a relationship. He wanted to hoe around so I just cut him off. Yeah, it hurt a little bit b/c I really liked him but it was the best thing for me to do.


awwww. how long ago was this sis? are you over him now?

this dude wants to be exclusive...but still...FWB is just not gonna cut it for me. i want something more.
 

NickiThePanda

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awwww. how long ago was this sis? are you over him now?

this dude wants to be exclusive...but still...FWB is just not gonna cut it for me. i want something more.

Like a month ago. I'm over it now but I still think about him sometimes. I wouldn't trust that exclusive bs either. If he wants to have xes with only you then why can't he just be your boyfriend? You say yall hang out and go on dates, add xes to that then that's basically a relationship.
 

Maeby Funke

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Dang when I was 18 & in college, I wasn't worried about being tied down in any relationship...I was too busy having fun and enjoying my independence.
 

CallmeQueenB

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Like a month ago. I'm over it now but I still think about him sometimes. I wouldn't trust that exclusive bs either. If he wants to have xes with only you then why can't he just be your boyfriend? You say yall hang out and go on dates, add xes to that then that's basically a relationship.


you and me both sis
Ben-Wyatt-I-Dont-Get-It-At-All.gif


i mean he went through a bad break up but it's been like a year since...i don't think that's why he won't commit. i really don't wanna start thinking up excuses for him.

Dang when I was 18 & in college, I wasn't worried about being tied down in any relationship...I was too busy having fun and enjoying my independence.

of course, because you weren't catching feelings for anyone right? independence is all fun until you start really liking someone and want to be with only them.
Wake up and smell the roses your a side chick

i can't be a side chick cause there's no main chick. i'm the only girl in his life right now.
 

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