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high school alley: friends with benefits

NixyOsoFair

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Home boy is the one always blowing up my phone though
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i mean i'm just saying. just this evening he asked me to come watch the super bowl with him. i gracefully rejected the invite of course. :pwink:

He wants puss, he invited you to sit in his house, so he could bust you down during the commercial break. If he wanted something more, he'd be inviting you to a super bowl party at his family's house. If a guy says to you he doesn't want to date you and he only wants to screw you and be your "friend" that's what it is. You don't need a decoder ring, no invisible ink, no code to crack... he told you what it was.
 

Terriann

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you already know what the answer is but you do not want to see it baby girl. he wants you for xes, that is all.

every minute you stay with a man who only wants a FWB while you want a relationship, you are hurting yourself.

there is nothing you can do to convince this man that you are 'worth' it because if he cannot see your worth right now, he will never be able to fully appreciate you.

please leave this situation, and i think i speak for a lot of women of LSA who have been in this situation that this man will only break your heart.

i hope you find the courage to leave this situation OP
 
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Girl you sound like me during my freshman year of college. I was talking to & spending all my time with this guy and whenever I brought up the whole "what are we" convo he would say "I'm not ready for a relationship". So long story short some girl he was messing with before me came back in the picture so I cut it off. I spent a weekend being all sad then I went to the club and was over it. Two weeks later i started talking to a new guy and he asked me to be his GF.

So my advice is to just end it and eventually you'll find somebody who won't hesitate to make you his GF. Good Luck ❤


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Terriann

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He wants puss, he invited you to sit in his house, so he could bust you down during the commercial break. If he wanted something more, he'd be inviting you to a super bowl party at his family's house. If a guy says to you he doesn't want to date you and he only wants to screw you and be your "friend" that's what it is. You don't need a decoder ring, no invisible ink, no code to crack... he told you what it was.
^^ accurate answer!!! damn, OP i really hope ur listening to LSA, the advice is on point and so damn true.
 

IConfess

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i've always been so confident, but with him sometimes i feel inferior just because i keep thinking, am i not good enough?? maybe if i was prettier he'd wanna date me...stuff like that. and that's just not gonna work. because in actuality i'm too good for him, everyone tells me so, and deep down i know it's true.

I am going to write this because you need to hear it.

You have to stop trying to rationalize things, and just accept it for what it is. Sometimes people mesh well together, and sometimes they don't. It has nothing to do with you personally...you just aren't the one for him. When men are ready to commit to a woman, it doesn't take long for them to decide to do so.

Don't spend your time wondering why, because there is someone better for you.

You keep talking about him calling you and all that but what you don't understand is that men will do that. He will call you, text you, hang out with you, etc but still not see you as anything but a xes toy that he calls "friend". Men will rarely say "it's over" because they don't want to be the bad guy. It will only be over when YOU say it's over.

But he did tell you how he felt, so he probably assumes that you know his feelings and you are cool with being his xes toy.

He isn't thinking that you are sitting over here thinking about how you can make him want you, and how you will change his mind, etc. He thinks he told you what's up, and everything is cool.

As a side note- guys you have to stop doing that to women. If you know she wants a relationship and you don't- it's time to cut the cord. You are not being "nice" by stringing her along. Because it doesn't matter that you said "I don't want a relationship", she is going to see "but he calls me and he wouldn't do that if he didn't care......blah blah blah"

Take heed to my advice dear one, take heed.
 

CallmeQueenB

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He wants puss, he invited you to sit in his house, so he could bust you down during the commercial break. If he wanted something more, he'd be inviting you to a super bowl party at his family's house. If a guy says to you he doesn't want to date you and he only wants to screw you and be your "friend" that's what it is. You don't need a decoder ring, no invisible ink, no code to crack... he told you what it was.


we can't even have xes right now [uh..personal reasons] so it has nothing to do with that. we're friends first, don't assume you know the whole relationship because you read a post on a forum. when i tell you he's gonna miss me when i'm gone, trust me on that. i have my reasons for saying what i say.

how could he invite me to his 'family's house' when his parents don't even live here? he lives with his brother and sister. they're all in college. so technically it is a family house. we ALL hang out together ALL the time. we're all very close. you're completely assuming things you don't even know.

i'm not trying to decode anything. i already decided to end things. the purpose of this thread was just to get my feelings out.

I don't know why you're so upset. did i accidentally run over your cat? like damn.
excuse-me-3.gif


--

you can 'groan' all you want honey, i'm just telling you facts.
 

NixyOsoFair

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^^ accurate answer!!! damn, OP i really hope ur listening to LSA, the advice is on point and so damn true.


Nope, not happening. People see what they want and she was more concerned with the poster who said it worked for her in the end, even though it was rocky and tumultuous road.... but she's over him though so no need to waste your breath, lol.
:pwink:
 

Sp0ttie0ttie

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OP, if y'all cannot have xes then what do you mean "friends with benefits" ?
Just curious, because I don't understand.
 

Issawifenow

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Girl I'm experiencing something similar.

Except he really does not give a fµck about me.

I am like beginning to hate him now and am thinking of ways to get my revenge for him treating me like trash.

the-grinch-grin.gif

Why would you revenge someone treating you like ish? You move on. That's how people stay and end up on ID channel or oxygen when they snap


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CallmeQueenB

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OP, if y'all cannot have xes then what do you mean "friends with benefits" ?
Just curious, because I don't understand.

we can't have xes right now, not in general lol

that poster was saying he only invited me cause he wants the p...so i had to dismiss her real quick.



Nope, not happening. People see what they want and she was more concerned with the poster who said it worked for her in the end, even though it was rocky and tumultuous road.... but she's over him though so no need to waste your breath, lol.
:pwink:

here you go assuming things again. i was trying to make conversation, i'm not "hoping" that it will work out like that poster. i don't have the time or energy for that. what do you not get about me already ending it?
 

Mrs Jason Momoa

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we can't have xes right now, not in general lol


:disdain:
Does he know you are on your period? Cuz I can guarantee he'd still try to hit it. eta: I just read in one of those threads that you're a virgin.

I think the point people are trying to make, is that he let you know what's up (what you told us in the op), so there's no need to "decode" what he's saying. (See the 1st bold statement below)


if a guy loves being around you, you make him laugh, he texts and calls you all the time, etc but says he does not want a relationship and only wants to be friends with benefits, what does this mean?

i'm on an emotional roller coaster. should i stay or should i go...i battle between letting him go completely and staying because i'd rather be FWB than nothing at all since i like him so much...but deep down i know this is not what i want. i need someone that will proudly claim me because quite frankly, i'm a catch. not even gonna lie...i'd be the perfect girlfriend seriously. my mom says :stop: i shouldn't let anyone milk the cow for free .

You keep saying something about leaving/it being over (whatever your terms are), what exactly are you "staying" in?


Wait, is this the guy that had xes with a girl while you were there? :disdain: :disdain:
http://www.lipstickalley.com/showthread.php?t=633468
From that thread
The guy you like had xes with another girl in your presence?
What would you do? say? in the moment? afterwards? would you say anything to him? to her? to anyone?

This just happened to me on saturday. It came as no shock, i knew he was a player but i let myself like him because i wanted to. Long story short, the guy i liked and kinda was talking to went into the room with another girl (this all happened on saturday) and i found out they had xes.


http://www.lipstickalley.com/showthread.php?t=637290


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ShadyBoots

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Sweetheart.....

annoyedgif.gif


You should've searched "Friends with benefits" and read the 50-11 threads about this very topic.

People are who they are, and when they show you who they are the first time, you better believe it. If he says he's not ready for a relationship and only wants something casual, believe him. If that's not what you want, leave him alone!


 

CallmeQueenB

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:disdain:
Does he know you are on your period? Cuz I can guarantee he'd still try to hit it. eta: I just read in one of those threads that you're a virgin.

I think the point people are trying to make, is that he let you know what's up (what you told us in the op), so there's no need to "decode" what he's saying. (See the 1st bold statement below)




You keep saying something about leaving/it being over (whatever your terms are), what exactly are you "staying" in?


Wait, is this the guy that had xes with a girl while you were there? :disdain: :disdain:
http://www.lipstickalley.com/showthread.php?t=633468
From that thread



http://www.lipstickalley.com/showthread.php?t=637290


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Yeah i know. I ultimately decided to end things....
i guess 'staying' in the FWB situation? lol.

Yes, but that was a misunderstanding lol. Trust me, i know how stupid i look but it's not what i thought it was.
 

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