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How can you be with a man that doesn't take care of his child

Anne Mae

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Did your dad say why he didn't see your sis?

Guess your mom understood Bc she was in same situation. Does your bro consider his stepmom his mom

no he always wanted to, but her mom was on some I'm a single mother sh!t. (hood rat) her family played a huge part in it too. They didn't like my dad for whatever reason. My dad would send my sister money when she got older and set up a bank account for her.

His dad has been married like three times.He knows who ibis mom is. My siblings are in there mid to late 20's now.
 

Betterhavemy

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People are having children (or aborting children ��) that they're not prepared to raise in any way... It takes A LOT to properly invest in a new human being and many people haven't invested in themselves.

I'm going to post this again, from Dr. Frances Cress Welsing's book, The Isis Papers


https://innerstandingisness.wordpre...ors-by-dr-frances-cress-welsing-pages-255-258


11) Immature and overwhelmed fathers and mothers cannot promote psycho-social development and counter Black inferiorization in the next generation.


12) Single female teenagers cannot promote psycho-social development in male or female offspring. And, most certainly, they cannot develop male offspring. They only can prepare these male offspring to spend their lives in penal institutions, while preparing their own daughters to become teenage mothers.


13) No Black female should become a mother before 30 years of age. No Black male should become a father before 35 years of age. Each Black family should have no more than two children, no closer together than three years apart. And, both Black males and females should, at a minimum, complete high school and become fully self-sufficient before marriage and parenthood. These structures are specifically for the purpose of countering the thrust for Black inferiorization and failed psycho-social development, under the conditions of white supremacy.

Where does he get this age thing? I disagree
 

Poodle

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Sometimes, you just don't know...

I dated a man for 3 years and had no clue, his family didn't mention it, his ex lived in another state with their child, and at 19, I didn't even think to ask if he had children, especially since there were zero signs. When he finally told me, I bought him a ticket to see his daughter. It went unused and I exited stage right. I didn't GAF if she was the devil and didn't bother to find out, shiz like that is inexcusable.

[MENTION=135069]TxBabBy[/MENTION] - I think if you added a disclaimer your posts wouldn't be taken so offensively. We've engaged in this convo before, and there are allowances for extenuating circumstances. Generalizations do nothing but fuel fire. Widows usually aren't made by choice...
 

Betterhavemy

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no he always wanted to, but her mom was on some I'm a single mother sh!t. (hood rat) her family played a huge part in it too. They didn't like my dad for whatever reason. My dad would send my sister money when she got older and set up a bank account for her.

His dad has been married like three times.He knows who ibis mom is. My siblings are in there mid to late 20's now.

Interesting. Thanks for sharing that it goes to show you never know what happens on outside looking in
 

Betterhavemy

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Sometimes, you just don't know...

I dated a man for 3 years and had no clue, his family didn't mention it, his ex lived in another state with their child, and at 19, I didn't even think to ask if he had children, especially since there were zero signs. When he finally told me, I bought him a ticket to see his daughter. It went unused and I exited stage right. I didn't GAF if she was the devil and didn't bother to find out, shiz like that is inexcusable.

Glad you had the self respect to leave him. Ugh he had NO excuses left to not see his kid once u bought that ticket . I know you felt disgusted
 

O.o

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Where does he get this age thing? I disagree

She is a noted psychiatrist. Probably based on her knowledge and experience. The human brain isn't fully developed until late 20s anyway. I agree. I think stable, prepared, mature people make excellent parents. I think immature unprepared people make sh!tty parents. Of course there are exceptions, but it makes sense to give your children every advantage. It's not clear to me while people are STILL having random children outside of a stable married relationship in 2014. Children are not accidents. There's always a xesual encounter that precedes them. People have children under horrible adverse conditions and then cry and moan for having to take care of them and act like they're heroes...
 

Poodle

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Glad you had the self respect to leave him. Ugh he had NO excuses left to not see his kid once u bought that ticket . I know you felt disgusted

To say I felt disgusted is to put it mildly. I even confronted his parents, both of whom just made excuses for their son. I was literally in shock at their attitude.
 

Betterhavemy

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She is a noted psychiatrist. Probably based on her knowledge and experience. The human brain isn't fully developed until late 20s anyway. I agree. I think stable, prepared, mature people make excellent parents. I think immature unprepared people make sh!tty parents. Of course there are exceptions, but it makes sense to give your children every advantage. It's not clear to me while people are STILL having random children outside of a stable married relationship in 2014. Children are not accidents. There's always a xesual encounter that precedes them. People have children under horrible adverse conditions and then cry and moan for having to take care of them and act like they're heroes...

I agree with the stability part but mid to late 20s is when my parents had me and most of my friends parents had them and I think it was ideal. People seemed more mature back then though. I don't feel there is a magic number.

Yea plan b is very easy to get now if you slip up. It's really no excuse.. It was still prescription only in my college and early 20s single days but we had the pill and that is really effective too ....however that plan b makes it like ridic if you get preggo


 

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ive dealt with someone and they weren't as active as they should've been.
At first I was like, there is no way I would ever let someone come between my child and i, let alone fool with some who isn't very active in their child's life because I know how it feels to be that child..


While we were hanging out he shared with me how his bm would behave. I would always say yea right, that's a cop out... One day I saw it for myself.
He would stop by his bm house once a week and give her money for groceries and buy whatever his daughter needed. The mom would want to take the kid to amassment parks and he would pay for them to go.
While he was taking care of his responsibilities the mom wouldn't let him spend time with his child and was constantly harassing him about things that had nothing to do with the child..
One day I witnessed him cry from the way she treated him, not letting him spend time with his child. After so long he got tired of her taking advantage and using his child to hurt him.. It got to the point where the daughter would only call when she needed something. He was paying her light bills and whatever else.
So he stop being in her life all together. Yes he could've went to court and fought that way but a lot of black males have court phobias... I think it was that and mainly him tired of taking her mom's sh!t and now his daughter turned into the mom.. a user..


Yes I dated him and I don't regret it... I try not to judge people or things as a whole, and more on an individual cases.


I think in a lot of cases people aren't mature enough for parenthood or have kids for the wrong reason and the kids suffer..


Outside of him, ive seen how vicious some of these females can be.. truth be told someone of them are worse then the men..


Example, how you have a baby by someone else man and expect them to be a full time parent to your kid. its unrealistic. Or he pays child support and you still wont let him see the kid cuz he has a gf


back on topic that's how I was able to mess with someone who isn't as active of a parent as they should...
 

Monika

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ive dealt with someone and they weren't as active as they should've been.
At first I was like, there is no way I would ever let someone come between my child and i, let alone fool with some who isn't very active in their child's life because I know how it feels to be that child..


While we were hanging out he shared with me how his bm would behave. I would always say yea right, that's a cop out... One day I saw it for myself.
He would stop by his bm house once a week and give her money for groceries and buy whatever his daughter needed. The mom would want to take the kid to amassment parks and he would pay for them to go.
While he was taking care of his responsibilities the mom wouldn't let him spend time with his child and was constantly harassing him about things that had nothing to do with the child..
One day I witnessed him cry from the way she treated him, not letting him spend time with his child. After so long he got tired of her taking advantage and using his child to hurt him.. It got to the point where the daughter would only call when she needed something. He was paying her light bills and whatever else.
So he stop being in her life all together. Yes he could've went to court and fought that way but a lot of black males have court phobias... I think it was that and mainly him tired of taking her mom's sh!t and now his daughter turned into the mom.. a user..


Yes I dated him and I don't regret it... I try not to judge people or things as a whole, and more on an individual cases.


I think in a lot of cases people aren't mature enough for parenthood or have kids for the wrong reason and the kids suffer..


Outside of him, ive seen how vicious some of these females can be.. truth be told someone of them are worse then the men..


Example, how you have a baby by someone else man and expect them to be a full time parent to your kid. its unrealistic. Or he pays child support and you still wont let him see the kid cuz he has a gf


back on topic that's how I was able to mess with someone who isn't as active of a parent as they should...

I was expecting a dude that ain't want to see his kid or pay for sh!t. He seemed like he was a good dude that messed with the wrong chick.
 

Betterhavemy

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ive dealt with someone and they weren't as active as they should've been.
At first I was like, there is no way I would ever let someone come between my child and i, let alone fool with some who isn't very active in their child's life because I know how it feels to be that child..


While we were hanging out he shared with me how his bm would behave. I would always say yea right, that's a cop out... One day I saw it for myself.
He would stop by his bm house once a week and give her money for groceries and buy whatever his daughter needed. The mom would want to take the kid to amassment parks and he would pay for them to go.
While he was taking care of his responsibilities the mom wouldn't let him spend time with his child and was constantly harassing him about things that had nothing to do with the child..
One day I witnessed him cry from the way she treated him, not letting him spend time with his child. After so long he got tired of her taking advantage and using his child to hurt him.. It got to the point where the daughter would only call when she needed something. He was paying her light bills and whatever else.
So he stop being in her life all together. Yes he could've went to court and fought that way but a lot of black males have court phobias... I think it was that and mainly him tired of taking her mom's sh!t and now his daughter turned into the mom.. a user..


Yes I dated him and I don't regret it... I try not to judge people or things as a whole, and more on an individual cases.


I think in a lot of cases people aren't mature enough for parenthood or have kids for the wrong reason and the kids suffer..


Outside of him, ive seen how vicious some of these females can be.. truth be told someone of them are worse then the men..


Example, how you have a baby by someone else man and expect them to be a full time parent to your kid. its unrealistic. Or he pays child support and you still wont let him see the kid cuz he has a gf


back on topic that's how I was able to mess with someone who isn't as active of a parent as they should...

Gotcha.
 

JeanPiggy

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I was expecting a dude that ain't want to see his kid or pay for sh!t. He seemed like he was a good dude that messed with the wrong chick.


yea, they had her really young. I think at like 18 and 19. I think he stepped up because his dad was never there
 

JeanPiggy

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Gotcha. Well He at least was trying.. I'm thinking of Moreso guys that just straight don't do anything for the child and never try to see the child at all


yea, my father was like that... his wife didn't like us. I didn't have a relationship with him until she died...


I will never forgive him or respect her for not allowing him to be in our lives... He had to sneak to call us from work. sad...


his wife wasn't sh!t
 

Betterhavemy

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yea, my father was like that... his wife didn't like us. I didn't have a relationship with him until she died...


I will never forgive him or respect her for not allowing him to be in our lives... He had to sneak to call us from work. sad...


his wife wasn't sh!t

That's horrible. Sorry
 

Nana Peazant

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xes. Same Values.
[MENTION=135069]TxBabBy[/MENTION] 's delivery is harsh but I think this is what she's saying -

People who want a nuclear family don't date people with children. It's in conflict with their values.

Women who date men with children are often women whose values line up with a man who has divorced or has children out of wedlock. They may then be understanding of men who do not provide for their children because they consider it an indication of that person's past (maybe even mistakes) rather than a representation of their value system.

Here's an example:



So he stop being in her life all together. Yes he could've went to court and fought that way but a lot of black males have court phobias... I think it was that and mainly him tired of taking her mom's sh!t and now his daughter turned into the mom.. a user..


Yes I dated him and I don't regret it... I try not to judge people or things as a whole, and more on an individual cases.
 

Betterhavemy

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xes. Same Values.
[MENTION=135069]TxBabBy[/MENTION] 's delivery is harsh but I think this is what she's saying -

People who want a nuclear family don't date people with children. It's in conflict with their values.

Women who date men with children are often women whose values line up with a man who has divorced or has children out of wedlock. They may then be understanding of men who do not provide for their children because they consider it an indication of that person's past (maybe even mistakes) rather than a representation of their value system.

Here's an example:

I disagree with the first part of your statement I currently have and always wanted a nuclear family but seriously dated a man with kids but he was extremely active in his daughters life she was and still is his everything. Prolly the one thing I respect about him. My husband did not have kids though

The second part I agree I didn't notice until you quoted that she made major excuse for him and accepted that he walked away from his child
 

JAYLISSA

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I work in a center for children (DRAMA ALL DAY) I see a lot of times is the feeling of " he had drama with those women but he aint gunna have issues with me I am different."
One of my cousins friends ended up at the center, smart and pretty. She was crying that her child's father aint did ish for her child. So I asked her is he taking care of his other kids? She said no and he four others he don't take care of. I was like well the writing was on the wall why did you think you baby number 5 would be different from 1-4? She said I though this time would be different and that you have hope for the best. meh!
 

Kim Kardashian

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Someone I know is married to a guy who had a kid about a year ago. He's not active in the kids life and I personally think the wife likes it. She doesn't have to deal with the baby mama. Recently the guy has been sending money for the kid. She talks to me a lot about the situation. From what I get she's not okay with this other child but she's trying to accept because she loves him. But he's said to her if you don't want me to be involved I won't. I'm like what kind of sh!t is that. That should show you what kind of man you have. She has a child of her own she should understand what it's like when a father is not around. I just smh and listen to her. Then she'll say my man is a good man lol I want to laugh at her so bad but everyone else doubts their love so I just try to be as supportive as I can. At the end that's all what people want is support for their good or bad decisions.
 

O.o

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People need to just stop fawking if they're not prepared to raise a child together in a stable home. Because fawking LEADS TO CHILDREN.
 

Mz. Judgement

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Some women with kids or child free think that the time he doesn't spend with his other kids his mother time for them or them and their kids.

I dated one kid who wasn't really invovled and he always use the excuse of his baby mother. She was horrible but I did learn from that relationship that some men always have excuses about why they can't be in their child lives and that if they really wanted to be there no horrible baby mother would stop them. I also learn that it's best if I stay away from men with kids because it always going to be issues.
 

JeanPiggy

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I disagree with the first part of your statement I currently have and always wanted a nuclear family but seriously dated a man with kids but he was extremely active in his daughters life she was and still is his everything. Prolly the one thing I respect about him. M iny husband did not have kids though

The second part I agree I didn't notice until you quoted that she made major excuse for him and accepted that he walked away from his child


I wasnt making excuses, just sharing why he isnt in the childs life anymore. I didnt say I agreed.

No I dont judge as a whole because there are too many grey areas in life.

Question. Are you saying no matter what a person is suppose to take verbal abuse and be used by the other parent. And what do you do when you cant reach your child but she can always call when she needs or want something... so your contine being a doormate? Serious question.
 

JeanPiggy

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xes. Same Values.
[MENTION=135069]TxBabBy[/MENTION] 's delivery is harsh but I think this is what she's saying -

People who want a nuclear family don't date people with children. It's in conflict with their values.

Women who date men with children are often women whose values line up with a man who has divorced or has children out of wedlock. They may then be understanding of men who do not provide for their children because they consider it an indication of that person's past (maybe even mistakes) rather than a representation of their value system.

Here's an example:
No that is not what im saying. How can a child be someones past. I said exactly what I meant.

My values are my values and they dont line up with a divorced man... you dont even know me and judging me and judging me incorrectly. You should ask someone to clearify what they mean before you assume
 

JeanPiggy

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Im over it...this why I dont share. People to quick to judge and assume.... and then attack your character.. sh!t is wack
 

Betterhavemy

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I wasnt making excuses, just sharing why he isnt in the childs life anymore. I didnt say I agreed.

No I dont judge as a whole because there are too many grey areas in life.

Question. Are you saying no matter what a person is suppose to take verbal abuse and be used by the other parent. And what do you do when you cant reach your child but she can always call when she needs or want something... so your contine being a doormate? Serious question.

I'm not judging you..just stating how you said he could have gone to courts but black men are afraid of courts or something like that.

If that's a serious question I'll give you a serious answer. YES no matter what a person should do everything to be in their child's life. There's no "giving up" on seeing your child.

I'm glad you shared. don't feel beat up on. At least you're not with that guy anymore
 

JeanPiggy

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I'm not judging you..just stating how you said he could have gone to courts but black men are afraid of courts or something like that.

If that's a serious question I'll give you a serious answer. YES no matter what a person should do everything to be in their child's life. There's no "giving up" on seeing your child.

I'm glad you shared. don't feel beat up on. At least you're not with that guy anymore


For the record when she took his child across state lines and she went to foster care he tried to get custody and they denied him. Said they like to return the child to the person they took them from..

Before that he went to court and he pays child support. And would see the kid when the momma allowed. He wasnt going to call the police everytime she denied him visitation. And how you see your child when the momma constanly changes her number and move..


You say at least im not with him anymore. He wasnt a bad dude.

Like I said im over it. For a lot of women their is no excuse for a parent to be absent, no matter what..

I dont agree with taking abuse and miss treatment from anyone. I dont care who they are.

People need to take shared responsibilty in the way they raise their child and not point the finger at 1 parent. But thats easy to do. Its harder to take accountablitly for your own actions and see how you contribute to the neglect of your child..

Goes back to people not being mature enough for parent hood and having kids for the wrong reasons. Thats the root of the problem
 

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For the record when she took his child across state lines and she went to foster care he tried to get custody and they denied him. Said they like to return the child to the person they took them from..

Before that he went to court and he pays child support. And would see the kid when the momma allowed. He wasnt going to call the police everytime she denied him visitation. And how you see your child when the momma constanly changes her number and move..


You say at least im not with him anymore. He wasnt a bad dude.

Like I said im over it. For a lot of women their is no excuse for a parent to be absent, no matter what..

I dont agree with taking abuse and miss treatment from anyone. I dont care who they are.

People need to take shared responsibilty in the way they raise their child and not point the finger at 1 parent. But thats easy to do. Its harder to take accountablitly for your own actions and see how you contribute to the neglect of your child..

Goes back to people not being mature enough for parent hood and having kids for the wrong reasons. Thats the root of the problem

Gotcha
 

Rhett

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Honestly, I can cee MANY women being happy with the fact her man sh!ts on and ignores the kids he had with a woman before he met her (the current woman). Happy because she not down for the baby momma drama and, with him not even in the kids or ex's life -- SHE WON'T HAVE THAT DRAMA IN HER LIFE.

I know that's ugly when yall like stuff all sugared up and spiced down but, when you pull the bµllsh!t off, the truth is what lies beneath. GIVE A fµck ABOUT YOUR OWN KIDS BECAUSE IF YOU EXPECT THE NEXT WOMAN TO -- YOU WILL BE ONE DISAPPOINTED ASS BEEYE. She will not care about your kids EVEN THOUGH her man is their father.

Not all.
 

Rhett

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People are having children (or aborting children ��) that they're not prepared to raise in any way... It takes A LOT to properly invest in a new human being and many people haven't invested in themselves.

I'm going to post this again, from Dr. Frances Cress Welsing's book, The Isis Papers


https://innerstandingisness.wordpre...ors-by-dr-frances-cress-welsing-pages-255-258


11) Immature and overwhelmed fathers and mothers cannot promote psycho-social development and counter Black inferiorization in the next generation.


12) Single female teenagers cannot promote psycho-social development in male or female offspring. And, most certainly, they cannot develop male offspring. They only can prepare these male offspring to spend their lives in penal institutions, while preparing their own daughters to become teenage mothers.


13) No Black female should become a mother before 30 years of age. No Black male should become a father before 35 years of age. Each Black family should have no more than two children, no closer together than three years apart. And, both Black males and females should, at a minimum, complete high school and become fully self-sufficient before marriage and parenthood. These structures are specifically for the purpose of countering the thrust for Black inferiorization and failed psycho-social development, under the conditions of white supremacy.
[/FONT]


I agree with everything except what I shrunk down to red 1 pt. font. That shrunken red part, while I see what the author is saying, I don't agree with it.
 

Nana Peazant

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People's values are revealed in their behavior. It's also common that these values shift.

I didn't assign a value judgement. I wrote that it's a values alignment.

I disagree with the first part of your statement I currently have and always wanted a nuclear family but seriously dated a man with kids but he was extremely active in his daughters life she was and still is his everything. Prolly the one thing I respect about him. My husband did not have kids though

The second part I agree I didn't notice until you quoted that she made major excuse for him and accepted that he walked away from his child


No that is not what im saying. How can a child be someones past. I said exactly what I meant.

My values are my values and they dont line up with a divorced man... you dont even know me and judging me and judging me incorrectly. You should ask someone to clearify what they mean before you assume
 

Nana Peazant

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Just to add because I know the Isis Papers and Frances, there was a study about the psychosocial and sexcual development of African Americans done by some Black psychologists in the late 60s and early 70s. The ages are the periods where Black people tend to have formal education and financial stability. She (and her husband Neely Fuller) think Black people can get married as soon as formal education is completed but suggested the family should spend those 10 years doing pre-family planning, saving money, establishing a business, etc. Also it's a strategy and not meant to be long term.
 

O.o

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Just to add because I know the Isis Papers and Frances, there was a study about the psychosocial and sexcual development of African Americans done by some Black psychologists in the late 60s and early 70s. The ages are the periods where Black people tend to have formal education and financial stability. She (and her husband Neely Fuller) think Black people can get married as soon as formal education is completed but suggested the family should spend those 10 years doing pre-family planning, saving money, establishing a business, etc. Also it's a strategy and not meant to be long term.
I agree but it's still appropriate for today's times because people are not functioning better.
 

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I agree but it's still appropriate for today's times because people are not functioning better.

Oh absolutely. She would say that the strategy has not yet been deployed. In a way, she's a futurist moreso than even a psychologist.
 

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We found out a distant cousin who is a deadbeat dad of not 1 but 2 kids just got married. He didn't invite our side which isn't s surprise LOL.

Anyways he's got two kids that he doesn't take care of at all. 1 in trindad that our uncle raises that he's seen once in his life.. And another one he's never even bothered to see. I doubt he'll ever come around these kids are both over 10 years old.

We were talking today about whst kind of woman could be with that kind of a man? He would disgust me. The minute I found out he didn't show love he'd be done!



Are any of you with men who don't take care of they'd kids by other women? How do you feel about him not caring for them? I promise I will try not judge of jump on you I'm sincerely curious of the rationale
I wouldn't be with a man who doesn't take care of kids. That is huge red flag.If you mistreat your kids, then you are going to mistreat our kids. I don't have kids, so I don't think I'd marry a man that has children with another woman period. I grew up in home, with a lot of half sisters, brothers, nieces and nephews. I don't want to go through that again with my own family. I'd truly rather be alone than to mess with a man with kids. Unless those kids were grown.

I hope I'm not out of pocket. I know the rules aren't to ask questions on another person's thread. But this brings me to another thought. Would you date a man who didn't get along with the majority of his family?
 

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There is no excuse for not taking care of your kids. Doesn't matter how they came into the world, single, married or no, no excuse. Anybody that doesn't care for their own flesh and blood is a person that will throw anybody under the bus.
 

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I wouldn't be with a man who doesn't take care of kids. That is huge red flag.If you mistreat your kids, then you are going to mistreat our kids. I don't have kids, so I don't think I'd marry a man that has children with another woman period. I grew up in home, with a lot of half sisters, brothers, nieces and nephews. I don't want to go through that again with my own family. I'd truly rather be alone than to mess with a man with kids. Unless those kids were grown.

I hope I'm not out of pocket. I know the rules aren't to ask questions on another person's thread. But this brings me to another thought. Would you date a man who didn't get along with the majority of his family?
I would have to know why he doesn't. If it's because of him doing some horrible stuff then I wouldn't but if it's because they are different from him or just horrible people then I would have no problems dating him. I am not family oriented so it’s not a huge factor to me.
 

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For the record when she took his child across state lines and she went to foster care he tried to get custody and they denied him. Said they like to return the child to the person they took them from..

Before that he went to court and he pays child support. And would see the kid when the momma allowed. He wasnt going to call the police everytime she denied him visitation. And how you see your child when the momma constanly changes her number and move..


You say at least im not with him anymore. He wasnt a bad dude.

Like I said im over it. For a lot of women their is no excuse for a parent to be absent, no matter what..

I dont agree with taking abuse and miss treatment from anyone. I dont care who they are.

People need to take shared responsibilty in the way they raise their child and not point the finger at 1 parent. But thats easy to do. Its harder to take accountablitly for your own actions and see how you contribute to the neglect of your child..

Goes back to people not being mature enough for parent hood and having kids for the wrong reasons. Thats the root of the problem

I totally get your point. The man that I was referring to is an old college friend. He impregnated this frumpy White girl. We tried to tell him that she was crazy back then, but it was too late. She was pregnant 3 months into the relationship. She thought that this mofo was going into the league after college and she was trying to come up. Well.....he didn't get into to the NFL and that's when the madness started. They broke up and then she really went apeshit.
He tried to do the coparenting thing with her, but she brought excess drama to the table and used their daughter as a pawn. She has gone to this man's job and tried to get him fired, harassed his girlfriends, and has filed numerous false police reports on him. And her family is racist and a pain in the ass too. He still pays child support, but from my understanding he now has limited contact with his daughter. He went though years of this before he gave up, and I'm sure that he never even told me all of the horror stories. The baby mama goes around telling everyone that he is a deadbeat, while using the child support money to support random broke ass negros. Btw, she has two other baby daddies, and those men don't fµck with her either
The point is, when women begin to behave like this, it can make a man run. This theory does not apply for pussy ass men that never intended to take care of their children in the first place.
 

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I totally get your point. The man that I was referring to is an old college friend. He impregnated this frumpy White girl. We tried to tell him that she was crazy back then, but it was too late. She was pregnant 3 months into the relationship. She thought that this mofo was going into the league after college and she was trying to come up. Well.....he didn't get into to the NFL and that's when the madness started. They broke up and then she really went apeshit.
He tried to do the coparenting thing with her, but she brought excess drama to the table and used their daughter as a pawn. She has gone to this man's job and tried to get him fired, harassed his girlfriends, and has filed numerous false police reports on him. And her family is racist and a pain in the ass too. He still pays child support, but from my understanding he now has limited contact with his daughter. He went though years of this before he gave up, and I'm sure that he never even told me all of the horror stories. The baby mama goes around telling everyone that he is a deadbeat, while using the child support money to support random broke ass negros. Btw, she has two other baby daddies, and those men don't fµck with her either
The point is, when women begin to behave like this, it can make a man run. This theory does not apply for pussy ass men that never intended to take care of their children in the first place.

I respect your opinion not jumping on you.. THOTS are bitter women make it tough but My question is what difference is the reason if the child ends up with no father tho ? I think some people forget these children are living breathjng beings who are walking around with no relationship with their dad. I realize so,etimes take my father for granted.. I can't imagine what it's like growing up whrn others have a dad and you just... Don't.
 

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I respect your opinion not jumping on you.. THOTS are bitter women make it tough but My question is what difference is the reason if the child ends up with no father tho ? I think some people forget these children are living breathjng beings who are walking around with no relationship with their dad. I realize so,etimes take my father for granted.. I can't imagine what it's like growing up whrn others have a dad and you just... Don't.

I grew up in a 2 parent household too so I can't imagine not having a dad....but I also can't imagine having a thot for a mother that chases my father away
 

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I grew up in a 2 parent household too so I can't imagine not having a dad....but I also can't imagine having a thot for a mother that chases my father away

There's no such thing as chasing a father away from their child IMO. Someone would have to kill me in order to never see my kid again and that's real. But if the man has to fall back until the kid is 15/16 and doesn't have to go through the mom anymore I can understand that at at least.


In the situation in my OP anyways I'm talking about guys that dont see their kid even when the mother literally begs
 

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They don't care. I have no respect for a woman who is cool with her man abandoning his kids or her kids.
I completely agree, why would you want to put yourself in the same position?
 

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