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How do I hide I’m a rich *****?

incogneato

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I have been raised to keep my money separate from men - never pick up a bill, never tell a man my income, always have a secret bank account etc.

Keeping my income a secret is getting increasingly difficult as I progress in my career. I work at a household name company and my salary is easily found on Glassdoor. I’m in the top 10%.

I’ve started online dating again for the first time in 2 years. I never put my job title or place of work because of how easily my salary and LinkedIn can be found, but it eventually comes up in conversation. I usually lie about my seniority level.

For other high earning women, what do you do to remain stealth?
 

banksy212

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I have been raised to keep my money separate from men - never pick up a bill, never tell a man my income, always have a secret bank account etc.

Keeping my income a secret is getting increasingly difficult as I progress in my career. I work at a household name company and my salary is easily found on Glassdoor. I’m in the top 10%.

I’ve started online dating again for the first time in 2 years. I never put my job title or place of work because of how easily my salary and LinkedIn can be found, but it eventually comes up in conversation. I usually lie about my seniority level.

For other high earning women, what do you do to remain stealth?
They call me Banksy, so no one knows how much I earn
 

LuvmesumMe

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A pro will sniff you out like a crackead, trust me, they can tell and will play the part. Just be honest, you never have to disclose your salary or merge bank accounts...Or pay for a bill for that matter. Stunt on these broke ass hoes Op.(JJ)
 

LeBronFan

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OoVoF8U.jpg

You could...
just be honest, and have a dude sign a prenup, so he don't leave wit half.
If you ever decide to Marry him...

By the way, yo thread got me thinking about this song...
Kanye West Ft. Jamie Foxx - Gold Digger (Lyrics Video)


"Now I sayin'..." he "a gold digger, but..." he "ain't messin with no broke" b...

:peace
 

jeansaprincess

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If you are dating on your own level or above that man will not be sitting around wondering what kind of money you have in your account. If you are dating broke, of course you will get inquiries from broke men or just men who are not on that level. With that said, you could dress very low key. No name brands. You can still have nice things just not in your face, noticeably expensive. Are you trying to not show you have money because you want to be taken care and not have to do anything to feel like you are in a women's place or you just aren't trying to spend a dime of your own?
 

Mantsho

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Don't do it b!tch. Don't do low vibrational sh!t and attract dusties. Embrace the rich b!tch you are and set your standards accordingly.

tenor.gif


Even if you have to change apps.

Try get a Raya pass. fµck the poor people.

giphy.gif
 

Kingshady

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Men can also leave with half and leave yo ass for a white girl.

It happened to an associate of mine. Date someone who is on your level and do protect yourself with a prenup if marriage does come up.
 

MajesticLife

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I wouldn't give seniority level either. That is the easiest way. Talk as if you are support staff in your role but you also can't pour on to the person issues about the job without cleaning up details. If the guy finds out later down the line, claim you were just interim while they searched for someone permanent in the role and ended staying because they kept losing people in that position but you never felt like it was a real promotion because it was by default/force. This is mostly necessary when you date guys in your pay bracket or just slightly higher or ever so slightly lower.

Many men may lie but some definitely feel slightly less masculine trying to court or IMPRESS you when they are aware you make equal or more. If the guy is also a decent earner, has great character and is all around a quality guy, you don't throw him away because you make 220K annually and he makes 195K. This is close and can always flip back and forth over a period of a few years. Unless you are a HR recruiter or heavily have to deal with external clients in your company, you don't really have to update your exact job title. So if your were a Senior XYZ role and then were promoted to Manager/Director/VP etc... you don't have to adjust your Linkedin.
 
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LustNLuxury

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Date men on your level or higher.
I don’t mean just financially either. Mentally, spiritually, and emotionally as well. Any man worth a damn is not using a woman financially.
tenor.gif


I don’t believe you can “hide” your salary. Once you start making money, you take better care of yourself. You usually go better places, wear more expensive clothing even if it looks homeless. Lol.
A true bummy ass man will be able to tell.
 

ziaaa

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I’m confused. You’re in the top 10% at your company. Presumably in a senior or higher level role yet you don’t know something as simple as how to tactfully withhold or disclose your salary? This post sounds fictitious.
 

Sackboy

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Why would your salary ever come up in conversation? Who talks about salaries when you’re in the early stages of getting to know someone?

I may ask a job title just for the sake of conversation, I think that’s pretty standard but actual income why? And why would anyone look up the salary of someone they’re interested in after finding out a job title? This is all very odd to me.
 

knc286

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There is really no way to hide your wealth when you are dating. You can downplay it but people who are financially stable can sniff each other out. Real recognize real. Just date on your level like others said.

with being rich comes a certain level of comfort you can’t hide. Even if you try to buy non brand clothing or drive that Toyota. Your fridge will always be full. Your place will always be clean because you can afford the extra help to maintain your space. People will always be able to tell.
Only entertain men who make more than you.
 

Gina Payne

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Smart girl(y) I'm probably not as wealthy as you incog but I'm very comfortable, i have way more more money saved than ppl think, not even my husband knows how much money I really have. Ppl know I have SOME money because I own some nice items, but they don't know I have may more money saved than they think. I try to understate it by not talking about it or giving any indicators. You have to protect yourself as a woman, no matter how deep in love you might fall, always have your own money stashed, and plus money that you're putting up from your job/income/etc and NEVER give a man (or anyone) access to your account. Now, if u get married one day and y'all want to have a joint account that he deposits in that's fine, but still ALWAYS maintain your own separate account that only YOU have access to that his name isn't on.

I know some ppl will get butthurt and salty over this post, but men have been doing what I'm saying for eons. So it's just that in recent years more women are starting to do this like men do, although many women still don't because they think it's wrong but idc, u have to protect yourself. Over the years there's been so many women who got left broke or in an abusive situation because they didn't make sure they were really straight or they let some guy have access or total control over their account/money and I refuse to ever be in that situation, so even with a husband who provides i still have my own money that he cannot access, or that anyone else can for that matter. It's good that some women esp bw are becoming more astute about this these days.
 

stillagoodgirl

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Simply date men who are on your level or above if you're concerned men who make less than you are after your money.

You can also be vague in the beginning and get more specific when you get to know the man better.
Ex. I work for a publishing company in the Bay Area.
 

just11412

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Yeah basically only date dudes on your level or higher.

Also I do not have an issue saying no at all anymore. Don't ask me for money if I am not asking you.
 

sunkiss3

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I make good money too but only date men who make more than 200,000 usd per year and I lie and say I’m new to being a realtor so they give me more lol

just lie say you’re receptionist or entry level even when talking to man with means
 

CuuntyAunty

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Smart girl(y) I'm probably not as wealthy as you incog but I'm very comfortable, i have way more more money saved than ppl think, not even my husband knows how much money I really have. Ppl know I have SOME money because I own some nice items, but they don't know I have may more money saved than they think. I try to understate it by not talking about it or giving any indicators. You have to protect yourself as a woman, no matter how deep in love you might fall, always have your own money stashed, and plus money that you're putting up from your job/income/etc and NEVER give a man (or anyone) access to your account. Now, if u get married one day and y'all want to have a joint account that he deposits in that's fine, but still ALWAYS maintain your own separate account that only YOU have access to that his name isn't on.

I know some ppl will get butthurt and salty over this post, but men have been doing what I'm saying for eons. So it's just that in recent years more women are starting to do this like men do, although many women still don't because they think it's wrong but idc, u have to protect yourself. Over the years there's been so many women who got left broke or in an abusive situation because they didn't make sure they were really straight or they let some guy have access or total control over their account/money and I refuse to ever be in that situation, so even with a husband who provides i still have my own money that he cannot access, or that anyone else can for that matter. It's good that some women esp bw are becoming more astute about this these days.
Everything sis said. Im so proud of us.
 

CuuntyAunty

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Thing is, once your own finances are right you worry less about who can do what for you, because you’re able to do it all. I could never date a broke man, but I’ve definitely dated men who made less than me and surprisingly our gross/net never came up.

I don’t suggest you hide anything that speaks to the quality of what you desire. Make people get on your level or stop indulging the bs sis. I like nice sh!t and while I don’t mind spending my money, I’d rather spend someone else’s.
 

sunkiss3

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Thing is, once your own finances are right you worry less about who can do what for you, because you’re able to do it all. I could never date a broke man, but I’ve definitely dated men who made less than me and surprisingly our gross/net never came up.

I don’t suggest you hide anything that speaks to the quality of what you desire. Make people get on your level or stop indulging the bs sis. I like nice sh!t and while I don’t mind spending my money, I’d rather spend someone else’s.

It get tricky if you guys are married and got divorced

don’t ever date down
 

Anzu

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I have been raised to keep my money separate from men - never pick up a bill, never tell a man my income, always have a secret bank account etc.

Keeping my income a secret is getting increasingly difficult as I progress in my career. I work at a household name company and my salary is easily found on Glassdoor. I’m in the top 10%.

I’ve started online dating again for the first time in 2 years. I never put my job title or place of work because of how easily my salary and LinkedIn can be found, but it eventually comes up in conversation. I usually lie about my seniority level.

For other high earning women, what do you do to remain stealth?

Just tell them a vague answer about what you do then change the subject.

Also don't wear loud luxury clothing until they know you better. Subtle luxury is best.

And lastly, have good vetting game. Don't date a moocher.
 

Bella8933

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I have been raised to keep my money separate from men - never pick up a bill, never tell a man my income, always have a secret bank account etc.

Keeping my income a secret is getting increasingly difficult as I progress in my career. I work at a household name company and my salary is easily found on Glassdoor. I’m in the top 10%.

I’ve started online dating again for the first time in 2 years. I never put my job title or place of work because of how easily my salary and LinkedIn can be found, but it eventually comes up in conversation. I usually lie about my seniority level.

For other high earning women, what do you do to remain stealth?

I am an older font that has made a high income for about 30 years .. though I recently retired early and am done with the whole dang gone thing! LOL!

But what you say about keeping your income to yourself is just standard stuff that all people and women do anyway. Who mixes their money with men other than prostitutes? A guy is supposed to pick up the check and I don't know anyone that discusses her income etc with the men she dates.

And why would you need a secret bank account if you are single? 'Secret' to who? The IRS? Because that is the only reason a single person would have a secret account. Strange.

If someone asks me where I work, I tell him. There are literary 10ś of thousands of employees where I work. What I do - Consulting. Again 10ś of thousands of Consultants out there - some low level, some high. There is no way a guy would know my income based on these two things alone. If your Linked in profile says you are a CEO - so what? You either have to pull it down or own it.

No one in my life .. has ever asked what I earned or how much my house costs and if they did - that would out him on the low level. Nor would I try to get that kind of info out of man. Duh!

Honestly, I don't believe in online dating, but if you outright LIE about where you work whatś going to happen when you get involved with him and he discovers you lied? He will wonder what else you are lying about so there goes the relationship. I don't think you should lie about anything.

Besides, IMO 99% of the men you are going to meet are not going to be appropriate for you anyway. They will mostly make way less money and have way less education so even after the first date ... you are going to be able to figure out what level they are on and lose interest anyway.

This has been my experience just when I am out and about and meet guys. I can tell by so many secondary characteristics that we are not on the same level.

Then there is the obvious issue that those sites are just xes hook-up sites for most men - who are themselves married or creeps. So most of the time they are not who they say they are, to begin with. :/

I think someone at your level needs to hire a professional matchmaker (you can afford it) because these dating sites are not for you.
 

Voets3k

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I have been raised to keep my money separate from men - never pick up a bill, never tell a man my income, always have a secret bank account etc.

Keeping my income a secret is getting increasingly difficult as I progress in my career. I work at a household name company and my salary is easily found on Glassdoor. I’m in the top 10%.

I’ve started online dating again for the first time in 2 years. I never put my job title or place of work because of how easily my salary and LinkedIn can be found, but it eventually comes up in conversation. I usually lie about my seniority level.

For other high earning women, what do you do to remain stealth?
You betta work!!! I stan a rich b!tch, lol!
 

HayleySmith

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I am an older font that has made a high income for about 30 years .. though I recently retired early and am done with the whole dang gone thing! LOL!

But what you say about keeping your income to yourself is just standard stuff that all people and women do anyway. Who mixes their money with men other than prostitutes? A guy is supposed to pick up the check and I don't know anyone that discusses her income etc with the men she dates.

And why would you need a secret bank account if you are single? 'Secret' to who? The IRS? Because that is the only reason a single person would have a secret account. Strange.

If someone asks me where I work, I tell him. There are literary 10ś of thousands of employees where I work. What I do - Consulting. Again 10ś of thousands of Consultants out there - some low level, some high. There is no way a guy would know my income based on these two things alone. If your Linked in profile says you are a CEO - so what? You either have to pull it down or own it.

No one in my life .. has ever asked what I earned or how much my house costs and if they did - that would out him on the low level. Nor would I try to get that kind of info out of man. Duh!

Honestly, I don't believe in online dating, but if you outright LIE about where you work whatś going to happen when you get involved with him and he discovers you lied? He will wonder what else you are lying about so there goes the relationship. I don't think you should lie about anything.

Besides, IMO 99% of the men you are going to meet are not going to be appropriate for you anyway. They will mostly make way less money and have way less education so even after the first date ... you are going to be able to figure out what level they are on and lose interest anyway.

This has been my experience just when I am out and about and meet guys. I can tell by so many secondary characteristics that we are not on the same level.

Then there is the obvious issue that those sites are just xes hook-up sites for most men - who are themselves married or creeps. So most of the time they are not who they say they are, to begin with. :/

I think someone at your level needs to hire a professional matchmaker (you can afford it) because these dating sites are not for you.

What was your experience with matchmakers?
 

rosalyn

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Wearing designer and using luxury brands like exotic cars, going to the top gyms and restaurants, living in an expensive neighborhood will actually attract high value men... it’s a status symbol. Are you worried about men using you? What difference does it make if he knows your income if you’re gonna go Dutch on dates anyways? If you live with a man he should pay all of the bills regardless of your income.
 

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