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How to go out alone to meet men

BrownSugarNY

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I was exactly where you are now a over a year ago. I am sorry for the break up but it will get better.

Here is what I learned so I hope this advice will help you to save time and heartache.

Before going out there I really suggest you take an inventory of your life and be F U C K I N G honest. Don't listen to your friends who say "there is nothing wrong with you!" my girlfriends told me that because I am a good person and they love me but they didn't tell me I could change my hair and style and get men.

Take a look what how you dress where you go and what you do. If you and your ex are in the same circles try new circles for a while. Change your hair. Change your style of dress. Get your mind right. The mental part is key. You have to be confident and truly love yourself. This part is the hardest but the most important. Work on these things BEFORE going out and trying to meet new people. Use affirmations and manifesting. There are tons of youtube vids on this.

Get in the marriage and accountability thread.

Go to the following places alone looking GOOD I have done this and to my shock I always get approached and have a great time.

Hotel bars- upscale.

Upscale parts of town. The more 30+ White people are there the better- I hate to say it but it's true. Nice restaurants look on yelp and look for places with more than two $

Steakhouse bars- Capital Grill and Ruth Chris have a n awesome happy hour.

upscale- upscale - upscale.

When at the airport always have a drink at one of the nicest places in your terminal.

On weekends just to have fun shopping in the best parts of town and treat yourself to lunch. You will meet people.

Sometimes museums, but fun things like cooking classes, wine tastings, comedy shows.

Good luck OP take it from me- all is NOT lost.

Girl yes! Co-sign everything stated your officially the friend in my head lol
For happy hours try and make a routine. Like every Thursday stop by. The bartenders begin to know you and if someone’s interested they will tell them when to catch you. Good luck!
 

BrownSugarNY

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The best advice I saw on this topic was to go out to a bar, order a drink and babysit it all night. Tell the bartender or who ever that you're waiting on your friend. When guys approach you, tell them the same thing. If you like them, you can keep chatting, but if not, take their number and continue to "wait" :dunno:


This all sounds easy but its extremely difficult for a shy girl like me. Im still trying to grow the balls to do this. My biggest fear is that will end up looking thirsty and silly.

Someone also suggested that I bring a notebook to a restaurant and eat and make notes.

Again.. I don't know how to do this without looking desperate.

Im trying to meet rich men btw

A notebook is a bit much. Bring a book you have already read as it’s a good talking piece but also Incase whoever approaches you read it as well. You don’t look thirsty they don’t know where your friend is duh lol
 

BrownSugarNY

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Every gym that has spa facilities with gym jacuzzi steam room etc is a great place to meet men.

I'm almost always was the only woman, I suppose it's because I am comfortable in company that's mostly male.

Do not talk too much or flirt, just gather info. You'll find out who's available, having an affair or happily married once they get used to you.

These are the types of single men I've met in the same gym.
- millionaire oil company owner specialising in lubricants
- millionaire software developer was single for years but now has a girlfriend
- Barrister
- post man
- school teacher
- boxer

ETA Wear a one piece!

I just switched gym locations to be in better company but think I need to sign up for a better gym all together especially when you mentioned spa services I thought oh yea that does make sense!
 

Thandi

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Oh and some women make the mistake of putting on alot of makeup and skimpy outfits.
The guys at my gym called it warpaint!

I just switched gym locations to be in better company but think I need to sign up for a better gym all together especially when you mentioned spa services I thought oh yea that does make sense!
 

Nulli

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If you are shy or don’t want to be looked at as a pro, just go to a popular restaurant (or one that has a nice crowd) and eat at the bar.

You are alone. Check.

You see doing something besides staring at your phone or fiddling with your hair. Check.

Enjoying an entree is a conversation starter- he’ll ask what you are having. Check.

Start with the drink, savor that for a while. Then get a menu, look over it, take your time. Get another drink. Order the food. Enjoy. Either have another drink or leave.

If you like the place, go back even if no one bites. You may be approached once you are a familiar face (again, a convo topic) or it just wasn’t your day that time. Do that before moving on to somewhere else.

In some instances going at a slower time may be better than a packed place. Crowds can mean men in groups with each other. A slower evening will have people sitting alone, even better option for sparking a convo.
 

Bella07

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I get anxious gonna not places alone sometimes...but I want to put myself out there more
 

HollySmith94

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I’m saddened by the end of a relationship that I stupidly thought would result in marriage. It hurts by I’m taking it day by day. I hate to get out on the singles scene but the weather girls lied about it raining men I got to be seen lol. Any tips for going out to meet guys when you are solo?

Update OP? (I know it’s only been a month)
 

Mary Jenkins

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Update OP? (I know it’s only been a month)
I haven’t implemented anything yet. My relationship was very toxic so I am working on me but I have started having me time like going to the book store or getting a coffee alone. That’s been fun to do.
 

loner4sure

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Find things that you like to do or want to do. Just go out and have fun.

Here my thing when you go out looking for a man you wind up meeting trash but when you are not looking and enjoying your life you meet a couple of potentials.

Take this time out and get to re-know you again. Get rid of your baggage from the last relationship and just go for it.
Yes this is absolutely true, don't go looking let it find you!
 

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