Quantcast

Inner thoughts about being “feminine”, patriarchy, and what it means to me as a black woman

Misschi_xo

Starter
Joined
May 11, 2016
Messages
122
Reaction score
Reactions
756 22 3
753
Alleybux
1,722
I don’t mean to hi jack the comment you replying to but I take vitamin B complex + inositol ! I’ve seen a major improvement in my skin and acne compared to last year.
Hey thanks! Hey if you don’t mind sharing where do you get most of your acne? Mine is kind of weird it’s mostly in my chin area and sometimes it’s just some tender bumps. Do you think seeing a dermatologist would help?
 

B00BooKeyS

Shut up
Joined
Dec 12, 2018
Messages
4,111
Reaction score
Reactions
79,490 1,913 432
88,044
Alleybux
444,000
Hey thanks! Hey if you don’t mind sharing where do you get most of your acne? Mine is kind of weird it’s mostly in my chin area and sometimes it’s just some tender bumps. Do you think seeing a dermatologist would help?
I got it mostly on my jaw and sometimes my neck. It literally looked like I had a beard of acne marks. I would recommend going to a derm because they can also help you with your skin care routine as well rather than just hormonal acne
 

MsFraser

Team Owner
Joined
Sep 24, 2019
Messages
7,648
Reaction score
Reactions
84,013 10,016 2,198
98,658
Alleybux
304,922
I wonder what people mean by "feeling" feminine. Do you guys also "feel black" or "feel human"?
How can you feel feminine without people around you validating your femininity? Femininity is a male construction. Men have associated feminine traits with being nurturing, soft spoken and having a feminine body/face. I personally dont care about looking or acting feminine, I dress how I want and sometimes I shave, sometimes i dont. Same with makeup. Many women have trained themselves to do these things to appease men and society at large. It's not like I enjoy shaving... that sh!t hurts. But I do it because otherwise I would be perceived as "dirty". Masculine women or women who reject male constructions of femininity are "dirty". I saw a woman in a tank top with unshaved underarms and my first thought was "wow, she's brave" not "she's dirty" because I know hair doesn't make someone dirty. My second thought was that she is truly living her life without the need for males validating her femininity.

But I do think feeling feminine is something greater than this. Women are women and our experiences transcends ethnic and cultural barriers. We have just let men take over femininity, redefine it, make it into something that can be used to control us.
 

Bubblyflute

Verified black
Joined
Oct 6, 2017
Messages
16,385
Reaction score
Reactions
159,185 7,026 3,410
161,045
Alleybux
287,244
This whole idea of feminity and being womanly is toxic AF, especially for Black women. Feminity was designed in whiteness. Black women, by birth right, will never fit into society’s acceptable image of feminity. Takeaway - live your life and stop trying to fit into a box that wasn't created for you anyway.
What is your definition or examples of femininity?
 

Bubblyflute

Verified black
Joined
Oct 6, 2017
Messages
16,385
Reaction score
Reactions
159,185 7,026 3,410
161,045
Alleybux
287,244
I see that went over your head. The concept of feminity was crafted on white women; their mannerisms and their bodies. Black women’s feminity has always been measured against white women. Think Serena, Michelle Obama, Queen Latifah. Why have they been called unfeminine? Because their bodies don't mirror what is considered feminine which again IS BASED ON WHITE WOMEN. Google Scholar is your friend.
The black women you mentioned don't look like the average black woman.
 

Similar Threads

News Alley

Ask LSA

Top Bottom