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Ish religious people say

High Horse

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“God makes no mistakes”


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andreamj1114

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When something goes wrong. Religious people will say things like:

"You didn't pray hard enough."

"You don't get to question God."

" You need to go to church more."
 

TheLurker2019

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Doctor gives bad news.

Religious person: “God has the final say. Don’t listen to these doctors. You’ll be ok. Just pray on it”

Person eventually dies.

Religious person: “it was god’s will”

They’re also fond of saying “god is good” when the DOCTOR saves their lives.
 

Naslif

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“Depression?? Mental illness?? You aren’t praying enough”

“Your faith is low”

“You can listen to Music but you wont listen to the Quran / bible / etc”
 

High Horse

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“We have a Disney app on our TV and I just said should I be worried because this like the 2nd time he’s attempt to adjust it so it tells him happy birthday Yes lil man has confidence through the roof and I should be more happy than concerned tomorrow is not promised as far as I’m concerned everyday is JESUS Birthday Christmas muthasuckas bahahaha God Bless byeeeee“

A comment on this site. Bish whet????
 

Sranan

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That everyone good is a blessing of God and everything bad is either work of the devil or a ''test from God''

If I am being abused, I am not being ''tested'' by God and it is just such a disgusting thing to say imo.
 

honeysugar

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Religious people when literally anything they don't like happens on a mass scale: " IT'S THE SIGN OF THE TIMES! We aRe liViNG iN tHe LaSt dAyS!!!"
 

High Horse

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Entire family dies in crash*

Them: god never gives you more than you can handle




A person dies*
Them: keep the family in your prayers

Me: wtf we prayer for? They’re already with god.
 

Alestra

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Religious person finds their keys” WOW, I’m so blessed, thanks God! ”

When asked about child poverty and war “God works in mysterious ways!!!”
 

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Thinks God will magically make a way for everything in life even when they’re sitting in their asses and making no effort
 

Argentum

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After working hard af in school/college/internships, they land a job:

'God has provided it' 'God blessed me with this job' Yep sis, it wasn't your degree and hard work that did it, it was God.....
 

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"This is where God wants me to be"



"Won't he do it" I'm so sick of hearing this phrase.
 

Helwa

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How religious people react to an atheist getting sick vs a devout follower.

Religious person gets cancer : God is testing them. He test the holiest believers.

Atheist gets cancer : God is punishing them for not worshiping the most high.

Here are some of my other favs:

"You just have to believe it. God knows what's best for his creation."

"God is the most merciful"

" such and such are having problems because they don't praise God"
 

High Horse

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Y’all notice how religious people will say it’s the end of times after every natural disaster, terrorist attack etc. Yet on 2012 or y2k they say oh only gawd knows when the world is ending.
 

High Horse

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Doctor gives bad news.

Religious person: “God has the final say. Don’t listen to these doctors. You’ll be ok. Just pray on it”

Person eventually dies.

Religious person: “it was god’s will”

They’re also fond of saying “god is good” when the DOCTOR saves their lives.


When I was diagnosed with cancer and was deciding where would I have treatment, my brainwashed grandma essentially said” it doesn’t matter where I go or what the doctors say because basically it’s in God’s hands.”


giphy.gif
 

Sunnyfleurs

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To excuse their horrible behaviour "the bible says don't judge" or the old "let he who is without sin cast the first stone" and then there's "He's not through with me yet".

Almost forgot the excuse for adultery and male thotting - "but King David/Solomon had more than one wife (was a thot) and God loved him"
 

Terribelle

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"You're going to Hellfire if you do.."
Man, I'm traumatised by the Hell horror stories I was taught.
 
Last edited:

Terribelle

All stans are mentally ill.Stop it,get sum help!
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"You're going to Hellfire if you do.."
Man, I'm traumatised by the Hell horror stories I was taught.
 
Last edited:

Lazuli

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Religious people when literally anything they don't like happens on a mass scale: " IT'S THE SIGN OFTHE TIMES! We aRe liViNG iN tHe LaSt dAyS!!!"

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With the way Corona's been showing her whole ass this year, it really makes you wonder though, don't it?
 

MsToniBlaxon

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"Pray about it"- answer for everything
"Everything happens for a reason"-just no.
 

Anatwyla

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(when I was struggling to find the proper medicine for my bipolar)

"You don't need no medicine you just need to pray!!! That depression is just the devil trying to get you!!"
 

QuiggtyQuack

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Believing their prayers were responsible for the results of biomedical science.

Moralizing about abortion while believing in a god that would demand its followers to cut open pregnant women to commit a genocide.

Being sanctimonious about not believing in any other gods and getting angry when someone doesn't believe in theirs.

Saying their god works in mysterious ways to avoid confronting contradictions but going into detail about what it hates.

Claiming to be more ethical while obliviously admitting their belief system is based on what they can get in return.

The usual.
 

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