cocoashinobi
MVP
I’m in my late 20s with not much going on for me but I’m working on it. I’m a single mom and have been living with my mother on and off since I graduated high school. My mother is over bearing and has never dated or really had friends which she uses me and now my child to help her with her loneliness. My great aunt has warned me about how my mom will never let go of me and when she said it I remember body turning cold.
I’ve left to set out and be independent but something bad always happens and I have to go back to her. She was always satisfied with that. I have identified on the surface level she is toxic but I sense there is something deeper. I’ve done as much as test how she reacts and says certain things and I’m for certain she is vibrating on something real heavy and dark, I see it in her mirror. I’m trying to break this cycle and I battle with it every single day and I’m afraid that I will never get away from her, to gain my independence for good because she is so heavy on me.
One thing I will share is that her mother died tragically when she was a baby and her father wasn’t around. She lived her life going from household to household and has fought to create a solid life for herself. She told me she had a baby at 18 so that she can keep my father around and I could be someone who loves her. But my father left and I had to deal with her toxicity ever since I can remember. My dad told me from young that I would have to be the bigger person I didn’t understand why she would treat me the way she did. Hugging her makes me cold inside. I have spiritual gifts and I’m always tired around her.
Every time I regain strength and confidence she’ll start talking hateful words towards me, almost like she’s in the cut watching me waiting to tear me back down. This has been years of this that I’m now catching on to. I feel like I’m in a simulation with her, and if I tell her my plans they’ll get ruined, they have and I don’t want believe that someone else can have power over me in that way but there’s a pattern.
My family is gifted but I also feel that we are cursed due to my great grandfather who was into wrong things in the Caribbean. I told her about how Im very sensitive and explained what my gifts are. The next day she used what I said to her to attack my character. As I get older and learn how to discern I would sometimes sit in disbelief.
I’ve been doing my shadow work and trying to work on mending my child self but it is HARD to do. I know I need to move away to start healing but I’m stuck and I’m not stuck like I can’t get anything done. I’ve worked hard with nothing in return and I’ve done nothing only to get opportunities.
I say all of this to ask if anyone knows of any
Spells or methods I can use to break a cycle of attachment? Im ultimately trying to understand what is happening in this situation and how to seek clarity so that I can remove myself or bring space in between this connection that is very toxic for me.
I’ve left to set out and be independent but something bad always happens and I have to go back to her. She was always satisfied with that. I have identified on the surface level she is toxic but I sense there is something deeper. I’ve done as much as test how she reacts and says certain things and I’m for certain she is vibrating on something real heavy and dark, I see it in her mirror. I’m trying to break this cycle and I battle with it every single day and I’m afraid that I will never get away from her, to gain my independence for good because she is so heavy on me.
One thing I will share is that her mother died tragically when she was a baby and her father wasn’t around. She lived her life going from household to household and has fought to create a solid life for herself. She told me she had a baby at 18 so that she can keep my father around and I could be someone who loves her. But my father left and I had to deal with her toxicity ever since I can remember. My dad told me from young that I would have to be the bigger person I didn’t understand why she would treat me the way she did. Hugging her makes me cold inside. I have spiritual gifts and I’m always tired around her.
Every time I regain strength and confidence she’ll start talking hateful words towards me, almost like she’s in the cut watching me waiting to tear me back down. This has been years of this that I’m now catching on to. I feel like I’m in a simulation with her, and if I tell her my plans they’ll get ruined, they have and I don’t want believe that someone else can have power over me in that way but there’s a pattern.
My family is gifted but I also feel that we are cursed due to my great grandfather who was into wrong things in the Caribbean. I told her about how Im very sensitive and explained what my gifts are. The next day she used what I said to her to attack my character. As I get older and learn how to discern I would sometimes sit in disbelief.
I’ve been doing my shadow work and trying to work on mending my child self but it is HARD to do. I know I need to move away to start healing but I’m stuck and I’m not stuck like I can’t get anything done. I’ve worked hard with nothing in return and I’ve done nothing only to get opportunities.
I say all of this to ask if anyone knows of any
Spells or methods I can use to break a cycle of attachment? Im ultimately trying to understand what is happening in this situation and how to seek clarity so that I can remove myself or bring space in between this connection that is very toxic for me.