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incogneato

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My builds management company has a new security guard who just scared the hell out of me. I've seen him about three times and we've caught each others eye each time, I'll typically just glace back at him while having small talk with whichever neighbor happens to be around at that given moment just so I can look at him and vice versa.
He's usually standing outside of the building next to the one I live because it has more space and they are owned by company.

Tonight around eleven I leave my building to get go grab some food from the food truck a couple blocks over and notice he's standing out front although it's later than usual. I reached the end of the block and looked behind me at the building he was in front of and noticed he moved closer to the curb and was staring directly at me, so I turned and continued my mission.

Here were it gets scary for me...Once's I returned to my building which requires a key to enter I noticed the guard's no longer out front although he's car is still there. I continues to enter the building but as I put my key in the door to open it, guess who pops up at the door inside the build (the building has two glass doors you have to unlock in order to enter) the guard of course which trough me off because he's never at my building, but I brushed it off and just held the first door open in case he was trying to exit and to keep some distance between us. As I'm standing there he starts to question me, "hey you live here?" I dangle my keys signaling yeah, he replies "that doesn't mean nothing" so I reply " yes I live here" he then says "which floor you live on?" I tell him the floor number he says "what's the apartment number?" I respond with the apartment number, after that he says " what's your name" I give him my first, he then ask for my last name I give him my last name.

What scares me is how he repeated "I'm going to check it out" twice as he exited my building. I don't want this man coming to my door and it's not in his job to ask me any of those questions, it also seemed premeditated how he timed the whole thing and now I'm afraid.
 

MajesticLife

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I wouldn't have answered any of those questions, literally not a single one. Yes, you were plotted on and cornered.
 

TurnItOff

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Girl. Talk to the building management, report that man then demand a new apartment. Also think about moving back home if you can't stop yourself from telling strangers all your personal info under pressure. fµck politeness and social norms.

The only thing he would have heard was "Yes I live in this building" with a key shake. If he has a rebuttal, "Then close the door." If he didn't let me in with my key, "Call your supervisor right now bc you're now blocking me from entering my home". Then if i hear another question "You're making me uncomfortable and I'll be reporting you. Call your superior here or I'll be calling the police" and I'd report him anyway.
 

Bella8933

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My builds management company has a new security guard who just scared the hell out of me. I've seen him about three times and we've caught each others eye each time, I'll typically just glace back at him while having small talk with whichever neighbor happens to be around at that given moment just so I can look at him and vice versa.
He's usually standing outside of the building next to the one I live because it has more space and they are owned by company.

Tonight around eleven I leave my building to get go grab some food from the food truck a couple blocks over and notice he's standing out front although it's later than usual. I reached the end of the block and looked behind me at the building he was in front of and noticed he moved closer to the curb and was staring directly at me, so I turned and continued my mission.

Here were it gets scary for me...Once's I returned to my building which requires a key to enter I noticed the guard's no longer out front although he's car is still there. I continues to enter the building but as I put my key in the door to open it, guess who pops up at the door inside the build (the building has two glass doors you have to unlock in order to enter) the guard of course which trough me off because he's never at my building, but I brushed it off and just held the first door open in case he was trying to exit and to keep some distance between us. As I'm standing there he starts to question me, "hey you live here?" I dangle my keys signaling yeah, he replies "that doesn't mean nothing" so I reply " yes I live here" he then says "which floor you live on?" I tell him the floor number he says "what's the apartment number?" I respond with the apartment number, after that he says " what's your name" I give him my first, he then ask for my last name I give him my last name.

What scares me is how he repeated "I'm going to check it out" twice as he exited my building. I don't want this man coming to my door and it's not in his job to ask me any of those questions, it also seemed premeditated how he timed the whole thing and now I'm afraid.


Why did you give him all that information on yourself?

Why didn't you give him the wrong floor and apartment number?

You need to report him to management immediately! This is how men crazy men that now know where you LIVE break into your home and assault you!

Report him to management and report him to the cops.
 

incogneato

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Is there a property manager or someone you can tell and let them know he made you feel uncomfortable
Yeah, I'd have to go over the property managers head because he's just as bad tbh. The Property manager entered my apartment while I was in the shower a few months ago, saying it was for a "inspection" once I mentioned how I wasn't given a 24hr notice or anything, his coworker who happens to be a woman called him out.

He's always trying to enter my place any chance he gets unexpectedly. I cracked the bathroom door in order to see who knocked on it while I was showering because it frighted me and he had the nerve to try to come closer to the door, then asked would you like for us to leave for a minute while you get dressed.

It's not safe to say the least.
 

DaPretty One

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I don't know why some men think that kind of intimidation/interrogation ish is cute or flirty. It is not! It's creepy and very chauvinist. By all means report him, ignore him and if he continues let him know that you are reporting his azz to management.
 

incogneato

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Girl. Talk to the building management, report that man then demand a new apartment. Also think about moving back home if you can't stop yourself from telling strangers all your personal info under pressure. fµck politeness and social norms.

The only thing he would have heard was "Yes I live in this building" with a key shake. If he has a rebuttal, "Then close the door." If he didn't let me in with my key, "Call your supervisor right now bc you're now blocking me from entering my home". Then if i hear another question "You're making me uncomfortable and I'll be reporting you. Call your superior here or I'll be calling the police" and I'd report him anyway.
In hindsight I should've handled the situation as you suggested, I will report it to a higher up for sure.
 

Bella8933

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The thought of it makes me feel like crying, his approach makes me feel violated and I no longer find him attractive because he seems dangerous.

Hold it.

You found him ... attractive?

See...now here is something you should know. If this guy IS attractive ..he is used to women being attracted to him. So it was very easy to recognize that you found him attractive too.

He is still an absolute creep ... however, you sent out the signals that told him ... you found him attractive. You have to be careful around men because some of them are creeps that will take such attraction as an invitation to approach you. That is why he basically cornered you like that in the doorway.

He was waiting on you.

You need to report that fool to management and the cops and stay at a friend's house for a while.

You really need to make a big deal out of this because .. once again, you told him where you live so itś only a matter of time until he engineers a way to trap you in your hall or staircase etc. :/

You are not safe.
 

incogneato

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Hold it.

You found him ... attractive?

See...now here is something you should know. If this guy IS attractive ..he is used to women being attracted to him. So it was very easy to recognize that you found him attractive too.

He is still an absolute creep ... however, you sent out the signals that told him ... you found him attractive. You have to be careful around men because some of them are creeps that will take such attraction as an invitation to approach you. That is why he basically cornered you like that in the doorway.

He was waiting on you.

You need to report that fool to management and the cops and stay at a friend's house for a while.

You really need to make a big deal out of this because .. once again, you told him where you live so itś only a matter of time until he engineers a way to trap you in your hall or staircase etc. :/

You are not safe.
I was considering calling a friend tonight and asking if I could stay the night at there place because of this situation.
 

boom1234

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I agree. Don’t tell that fool anything. He was out of line. You should look for another place.
 
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I was considering calling a friend tonight and asking if I could stay the night at there place because of this situation.
Yes stay the night if it’s not too late to go over. If not place something to keep the door from opening up. Next time don’t answer any of his questions or any stranger. Just reply “why. Mind your business” because ppl are crazy.
 

ilikebeer12345

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My builds management company has a new security guard who just scared the hell out of me. I've seen him about three times and we've caught each others eye each time, I'll typically just glace back at him while having small talk with whichever neighbor happens to be around at that given moment just so I can look at him and vice versa.
He's usually standing outside of the building next to the one I live because it has more space and they are owned by company.

Tonight around eleven I leave my building to get go grab some food from the food truck a couple blocks over and notice he's standing out front although it's later than usual. I reached the end of the block and looked behind me at the building he was in front of and noticed he moved closer to the curb and was staring directly at me, so I turned and continued my mission.

Here were it gets scary for me...Once's I returned to my building which requires a key to enter I noticed the guard's no longer out front although he's car is still there. I continues to enter the building but as I put my key in the door to open it, guess who pops up at the door inside the build (the building has two glass doors you have to unlock in order to enter) the guard of course which trough me off because he's never at my building, but I brushed it off and just held the first door open in case he was trying to exit and to keep some distance between us. As I'm standing there he starts to question me, "hey you live here?" I dangle my keys signaling yeah, he replies "that doesn't mean nothing" so I reply " yes I live here" he then says "which floor you live on?" I tell him the floor number he says "what's the apartment number?" I respond with the apartment number, after that he says " what's your name" I give him my first, he then ask for my last name I give him my last name.

What scares me is how he repeated "I'm going to check it out" twice as he exited my building. I don't want this man coming to my door and it's not in his job to ask me any of those questions, it also seemed premeditated how he timed the whole thing and now I'm afraid.
This makes me glad i live in the hood !

#hoodlife

#strugglelife
 

KarmaPolice

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Yeah, I'd have to go over the property managers head because he's just as bad tbh. The Property manager entered my apartment while I was in the shower a few months ago, saying it was for a "inspection" once I mentioned how I wasn't given a 24hr notice or anything, his coworker who happens to be a woman called him out.

He's always trying to enter my place any chance he gets unexpectedly. I cracked the bathroom door in order to see who knocked on it while I was showering because it frighted me and he had the nerve to try to come closer to the door, then asked would you like for us to leave for a minute while you get dressed.

It's not safe to say the least.

You need to document every incident in writing to the higher ups and make a case for breaking your lease. Do they own multiple buildings? If so, maybe you can move to another building so they don't try to penalize you for breaking the lease.

Get the door jams like @Driip said. If you have multiple locks on your door, use them at all times. Women who live alone unfortunately have to take additional precautions. Going forward, do not give all of that information about yourself to anyone. Limit conversations with anyone in your building or neighborhood who seem shady. Do not reveal your schedule or routine--- matter of fact, try to alter it when possible (i.e., if you're not wfh, come home at different times, if you leave to go somewhere like the gym, go at different times).
 

Zabel

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I agree with the font above. Until you find out what building management will do about the situation, get some sort of door security mechanism from Home Depot or other hardware stores.

It could be something like this:

Prime-Line 3-7/8 in. Hinged Bar Lock, High Security Door Guard, Diecast Zinc Construction, Satin Nickel Plated Finish-U 11316 - The Home Depot

and this

 

SuccessfullyMe

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The thought of it makes me feel like crying, his approach makes me feel violated and I no longer find him attractive because he seems dangerous.

Wait you found him attractive ... maybe he sensed it but is weird and awkward. But girl you found a guy working security at your building attractive ... once you know where I live, you unattractive.

I would file a compliant with the building.
 

SuccessfullyMe

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Yeah, I'd have to go over the property managers head because he's just as bad tbh. The Property manager entered my apartment while I was in the shower a few months ago, saying it was for a "inspection" once I mentioned how I wasn't given a 24hr notice or anything, his coworker who happens to be a woman called him out.

He's always trying to enter my place any chance he gets unexpectedly. I cracked the bathroom door in order to see who knocked on it while I was showering because it frighted me and he had the nerve to try to come closer to the door, then asked would you like for us to leave for a minute while you get dressed.

It's not safe to say the least.

Go higher than both of them. The PM doesn't own the place. I would threaten to leave in this case. You even have someone with a key to your place harassing you. How can you sleep there? Praying for you
 

SuccessfullyMe

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Yeah, I'd have to go over the property managers head because he's just as bad tbh. The Property manager entered my apartment while I was in the shower a few months ago, saying it was for a "inspection" once I mentioned how I wasn't given a 24hr notice or anything, his coworker who happens to be a woman called him out.

He's always trying to enter my place any chance he gets unexpectedly. I cracked the bathroom door in order to see who knocked on it while I was showering because it frighted me and he had the nerve to try to come closer to the door, then asked would you like for us to leave for a minute while you get dressed.

It's not safe to say the least.

Go higher than both of them. The PM doesn't own the place. I would threaten to leave in this case. You even have someone with a key to your place harassing you. How can you sleep there? Praying for you
 

BorisNatasha

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Go higher than both of them. The PM doesn't own the place. I would threaten to leave in this case. You even have someone with a key to your place harassing you. How can you sleep there? Praying for you
Go above the PM's head and report the security AND the PM. Heaven forbid they team up on you or someone else in the building.
 

Remy Newport

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You answered those questions because you thought he was attractive. Anyone else would have told him to go to building mgmt for that info. Mess.
 

MoneyOverLove

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I would have cussed his @ss out and called the police right there in front of him for playing with me. He had no right asking you all of that. And why would you answer him?
You need to report him to the property manager and call the police and file a report. Fukk him and his livelihood since he wants to abuse his whistle blowing @ss privileges.
 

LovelyLamp

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It’s always the scariest when those that are supposed to protect us are the ones we need protecting from. Like you, I probably would have given the guy all the information he was asking and then kicked myself later on for being so stupid.
 

Chenr41

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My builds management company has a new security guard who just scared the hell out of me. I've seen him about three times and we've caught each others eye each time, I'll typically just glace back at him while having small talk with whichever neighbor happens to be around at that given moment just so I can look at him and vice versa.
He's usually standing outside of the building next to the one I live because it has more space and they are owned by company.

Tonight around eleven I leave my building to get go grab some food from the food truck a couple blocks over and notice he's standing out front although it's later than usual. I reached the end of the block and looked behind me at the building he was in front of and noticed he moved closer to the curb and was staring directly at me, so I turned and continued my mission.

Here were it gets scary for me...Once's I returned to my building which requires a key to enter I noticed the guard's no longer out front although he's car is still there. I continues to enter the building but as I put my key in the door to open it, guess who pops up at the door inside the build (the building has two glass doors you have to unlock in order to enter) the guard of course which trough me off because he's never at my building, but I brushed it off and just held the first door open in case he was trying to exit and to keep some distance between us. As I'm standing there he starts to question me, "hey you live here?" I dangle my keys signaling yeah, he replies "that doesn't mean nothing" so I reply " yes I live here" he then says "which floor you live on?" I tell him the floor number he says "what's the apartment number?" I respond with the apartment number, after that he says " what's your name" I give him my first, he then ask for my last name I give him my last name.

What scares me is how he repeated "I'm going to check it out" twice as he exited my building. I don't want this man coming to my door and it's not in his job to ask me any of those questions, it also seemed premeditated how he timed the whole thing and now I'm afraid.
Why the hell did you answer those questions? That pissed me off
 

NarcoticVenus

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. As I'm standing there he starts to question me, "hey you live here?" I dangle my keys signaling yeah, he replies "that doesn't mean nothing" so I reply " yes I live here" he then says "which floor you live on?" I tell him the floor number he says "what's the apartment number?" I respond with the apartment number, after that he says " what's your name" I give him my first, he then ask for my last name I give him my last name.
Now you know not to give this info anymore. A lot of fonts are saying report him, and it is worth looking into, but bear in mind that you voluntarily gave him this information so there may nothing they can do unless he makes a move.

Please keep your wits about you and your eyes open and stop acting like a scared bunny rabbit when men like that approach. If you are in circumstances like yours, you need to have RBF between your door and your car. If he ever turns up at your door, DO NOT OPEN IT, and do not invite him in.
Yeah, I'd have to go over the property managers head because he's just as bad tbh. The Property manager entered my apartment while I was in the shower a few months ago, saying it was for a "inspection" once I mentioned how I wasn't given a 24hr notice or anything, his coworker who happens to be a woman called him out.

He's always trying to enter my place any chance he gets unexpectedly. I cracked the bathroom door in order to see who knocked on it while I was showering because it frighted me and he had the nerve to try to come closer to the door, then asked would you like for us to leave for a minute while you get dressed.

It's not safe to say the least.
This is definitely worth reporting, however, please read your lease to see what it says about management having access to your apartment. If it says that they have the right to enter at any time, you may be SOL. If it says that they need permission if you are in the apartment, you may have a case. Please read the lease first so you know how to move and don't embarrass yourself
He is still an absolute creep ... however, you sent out the signals that told him ... you found him attractive. You have to be careful around men because some of them are creeps that will take such attraction as an invitation to approach you. That is why he basically cornered you like that in the doorway.
RBF around people like that. I know we like to talk about meeting someone 'organically' but only creeps act like the whole world is a dating pool. Decent men will not approach you on either their job or yours.
 

SocaPrincess

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My builds management company has a new security guard who just scared the hell out of me. I've seen him about three times and we've caught each others eye each time, I'll typically just glace back at him while having small talk with whichever neighbor happens to be around at that given moment just so I can look at him and vice versa.
He's usually standing outside of the building next to the one I live because it has more space and they are owned by company.

Tonight around eleven I leave my building to get go grab some food from the food truck a couple blocks over and notice he's standing out front although it's later than usual. I reached the end of the block and looked behind me at the building he was in front of and noticed he moved closer to the curb and was staring directly at me, so I turned and continued my mission.

Here were it gets scary for me...Once's I returned to my building which requires a key to enter I noticed the guard's no longer out front although he's car is still there. I continues to enter the building but as I put my key in the door to open it, guess who pops up at the door inside the build (the building has two glass doors you have to unlock in order to enter) the guard of course which trough me off because he's never at my building, but I brushed it off and just held the first door open in case he was trying to exit and to keep some distance between us. As I'm standing there he starts to question me, "hey you live here?" I dangle my keys signaling yeah, he replies "that doesn't mean nothing" so I reply " yes I live here" he then says "which floor you live on?" I tell him the floor number he says "what's the apartment number?" I respond with the apartment number, after that he says " what's your name" I give him my first, he then ask for my last name I give him my last name.

What scares me is how he repeated "I'm going to check it out" twice as he exited my building. I don't want this man coming to my door and it's not in his job to ask me any of those questions, it also seemed premeditated how he timed the whole thing and now I'm afraid.
Why would you give him all that information.? It was a scary situation but I would’ve been vague and given a fake name at the least. Report him to the necessary authorities
 

UStoleMyName

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Why did you tell him! Do you have a friend or family member you stay with? That is scary. Find out who his boss is and get in contact with them.
 

jd007

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Yeah, I'd have to go over the property managers head because he's just as bad tbh. The Property manager entered my apartment while I was in the shower a few months ago, saying it was for a "inspection" once I mentioned how I wasn't given a 24hr notice or anything, his coworker who happens to be a woman called him out.

He's always trying to enter my place any chance he gets unexpectedly. I cracked the bathroom door in order to see who knocked on it while I was showering because it frighted me and he had the nerve to try to come closer to the door, then asked would you like for us to leave for a minute while you get dressed.

It's not safe to say the least.
Leave them a bad yelp review. And mention that they break the law by entering unannounced.
I've read lots of apartment reviews and read a few where people complained of this....
 

Thats

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how much to break the lease?
just based off of your previous experiences, i wouldnt feel safe
 

Sackboy

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Gonna need you to learn how to be quicker on your feet. You answered honestly to those questions because you weren’t expecting them. That’s what most people do, their first instinct is to be honest.

However, you gotta know how to switch up when you’re experiencing fear. Maybe prepare yourself if you’re leaving at night to just be more alert of your surroundings. Hopefully nothing comes from tonight’s interaction.
 

Tenderoni3

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My builds management company has a new security guard who just scared the hell out of me. I've seen him about three times and we've caught each others eye each time, I'll typically just glace back at him while having small talk with whichever neighbor happens to be around at that given moment just so I can look at him and vice versa.
He's usually standing outside of the building next to the one I live because it has more space and they are owned by company.

Tonight around eleven I leave my building to get go grab some food from the food truck a couple blocks over and notice he's standing out front although it's later than usual. I reached the end of the block and looked behind me at the building he was in front of and noticed he moved closer to the curb and was staring directly at me, so I turned and continued my mission.

Here were it gets scary for me...Once's I returned to my building which requires a key to enter I noticed the guard's no longer out front although he's car is still there. I continues to enter the building but as I put my key in the door to open it, guess who pops up at the door inside the build (the building has two glass doors you have to unlock in order to enter) the guard of course which trough me off because he's never at my building, but I brushed it off and just held the first door open in case he was trying to exit and to keep some distance between us. As I'm standing there he starts to question me, "hey you live here?" I dangle my keys signaling yeah, he replies "that doesn't mean nothing" so I reply " yes I live here" he then says "which floor you live on?" I tell him the floor number he says "what's the apartment number?" I respond with the apartment number, after that he says " what's your name" I give him my first, he then ask for my last name I give him my last name.

What scares me is how he repeated "I'm going to check it out" twice as he exited my building. I don't want this man coming to my door and it's not in his job to ask me any of those questions, it also seemed premeditated how he timed the whole thing and now I'm afraid.
You didn't think to lie? Natural selection at this point but seriously I truly hope you're safe. Maybe you can tell the head of security about this encounter so they keep an eye on him and if anything happens they have a suspect. Thoughts and good energy
 

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