cuntie
General Manager
Can we talk about how the King of all Werewolves and Hobosexuals is being disrespected right now? I know I showed outrage about Lucius being taken for granted but really - Remus is a proud hobosexual werewolf who would blow out your back to get access to your wallet and a place to sleep at night! It has been well researched and documented that hobosexuals and Werewolves lay down the most toxic and demonic pipe that leaves women unable to think or walk properly for days...imagine mixing that toxic hobosexual with that demonic werewolf. You get the unholy wand (10.5 inches btw) of Remus Lupin who is considered the King of all Werewolves and Hobosexuals! After years of hobosexual healing, he knows how to channel the power of werewolf into his stroke game to leave you busted out. Do you really think Tonks would take care of a hobosexual werewolf without testing out that wand first? He busted down her wide-set vagina (passed down from the Black family - I heard Bellatrix has the widest one! ) and made her see the moonlight! Remus knocked her up then made her Patronus go from a jack rabbit to wolf within a matter of months of hooking up! He laid down some demonic wand that even Tonks (a known dick eater) couldn't handle all that, she got trapped out here... let's pour out a 40 ounce for her. Guarantee if Remus laid down something on Bellatrix she would've forgotten about Voldie's basilisk for at least five seconds (three seconds longer than usual)
In the Harry Potter: Older Stan Poll, people decided to ignore the King of Hobosexual Werewolves?? People are stanning for Dumbledore even though we made threads saying he's a messy bottom ---what?? Snape, I can understand but no love for Remus?!
1. Snape, Half-Blood Prince, good with his hands, potionsmaster, double spy, hates children, the best catch, has hoes mad, biggest wand, hated for his success, better than you, successful wizard, isn't broke (probably), greasy hair but we don't care, has a thirst thread unlike your fave, proud Slytherin, master of occulmency and legilimency, has a job unlike some people (Potions Hive holding it down - 24 votes)
2. Sirius, Former Azkaban inmate, has an OnlyWands account since he can't get a regular job, lives at his momma house (21 votes)
3. Kingsley Shacklebolt, better than everyone on the list but we won't speak on that (12 votes)
3. Albus Dumbledore, a messy gay man who sends galleons to Grindelward's Azkaban commissary account, might get his body snatched in Colombia before Grindelwald gets out of Azkaban so he can look like Draya for him, headmaster of a ghetto ass school (Dumbledore might need his own thirst thread since even xes gods like Arthur and Hagrid didn't make top 4 - 12 votes)
5. Remus, the hobosexual werewolf himself (7 votes)
I can understand why BSA favorites like Arthur Weasley and Hagrid have already gotten thirst/appreciation threads for them...after all look at them but it's Remus's turn let's give him some love!
Remus is a good man, he just had a rough life in a discriminatory world where people hate werewolves! All he needs is a strong, independent witch who will hold him down until he gets a job in this hating ass world.
Remus looks so fine in this gif - someone once said they know he fucks better when it's closer to the full moon and I want to believe
Okay but for real...Remus is a good guy who just had a bad life. He was targeted by Fenrir Greyback (who likes to assault and turn children into werewolves) just because his father said something he didn't like. I know people drag Remus for being a bully but really he was a bystander to Sirius, James, and Ugly Rat's bullying, not an active bully with them. It's not that better but in his defense, the Maurader's were actually great friends to him since they were willing to make his transition into being a werewolf every full moon easier/happier plus he thought if he went against them, they would expose him as a werewolf which would end his school career at Hogwarts if the Ministry found out. He was a teen who didn't really have a backbone for himself since he was used to being alone and tormented by being a werewolf. After Hogwarts, he struggled for years to find stable work since the wizarding world hated and feared werewolves. Since most werewolves couldn't afford Wolfsbanes potion because of expensive ingredients and it required a lot of skill to create, werewolves just had to suffer every full moon and become dangers to themselves and others. Werewolves had no choice to live with this disease like they were second-class citizens just because Fenrir Greyback and his gang were crazy lunatics who went around killing, harming, and turning everyone into werewolves like them. Remus was also Harry's best teacher and he really did deserve better than to die without being able to raise his son. Also, Tonks deserved better too!
In the Harry Potter: Older Stan Poll, people decided to ignore the King of Hobosexual Werewolves?? People are stanning for Dumbledore even though we made threads saying he's a messy bottom ---what?? Snape, I can understand but no love for Remus?!
1. Snape, Half-Blood Prince, good with his hands, potionsmaster, double spy, hates children, the best catch, has hoes mad, biggest wand, hated for his success, better than you, successful wizard, isn't broke (probably), greasy hair but we don't care, has a thirst thread unlike your fave, proud Slytherin, master of occulmency and legilimency, has a job unlike some people (Potions Hive holding it down - 24 votes)
2. Sirius, Former Azkaban inmate, has an OnlyWands account since he can't get a regular job, lives at his momma house (21 votes)
3. Kingsley Shacklebolt, better than everyone on the list but we won't speak on that (12 votes)
3. Albus Dumbledore, a messy gay man who sends galleons to Grindelward's Azkaban commissary account, might get his body snatched in Colombia before Grindelwald gets out of Azkaban so he can look like Draya for him, headmaster of a ghetto ass school (Dumbledore might need his own thirst thread since even xes gods like Arthur and Hagrid didn't make top 4 - 12 votes)
5. Remus, the hobosexual werewolf himself (7 votes)
I can understand why BSA favorites like Arthur Weasley and Hagrid have already gotten thirst/appreciation threads for them...after all look at them but it's Remus's turn let's give him some love!
Remus is a good man, he just had a rough life in a discriminatory world where people hate werewolves! All he needs is a strong, independent witch who will hold him down until he gets a job in this hating ass world.
- He wants to borrow your broomstick to
fly around smoking weed and accidentally bumping into trees and being spotted by mugglesget a job - He wants to borrow some Galleons to
buy something for Sirius (his prison inmate friend who wants to join in on a threesome - will you let him join?) or a hoe from Hufflepuffbuy new robes to look presentable at job interviews - He wants to sleep at your house because
he has nowhere else to beso he can protect and hold you at night - He wants to get married in one month of marriage because
he wants a permanent householdknows you are the one for him - He wants to hold your purse when you guys out so
we can have quick access to your Galleonsyour gentle shoulders can get a little rest for taking care of yourhobosexual werewolfman
Remus looks so fine in this gif - someone once said they know he fucks better when it's closer to the full moon and I want to believe
Okay but for real...Remus is a good guy who just had a bad life. He was targeted by Fenrir Greyback (who likes to assault and turn children into werewolves) just because his father said something he didn't like. I know people drag Remus for being a bully but really he was a bystander to Sirius, James, and Ugly Rat's bullying, not an active bully with them. It's not that better but in his defense, the Maurader's were actually great friends to him since they were willing to make his transition into being a werewolf every full moon easier/happier plus he thought if he went against them, they would expose him as a werewolf which would end his school career at Hogwarts if the Ministry found out. He was a teen who didn't really have a backbone for himself since he was used to being alone and tormented by being a werewolf. After Hogwarts, he struggled for years to find stable work since the wizarding world hated and feared werewolves. Since most werewolves couldn't afford Wolfsbanes potion because of expensive ingredients and it required a lot of skill to create, werewolves just had to suffer every full moon and become dangers to themselves and others. Werewolves had no choice to live with this disease like they were second-class citizens just because Fenrir Greyback and his gang were crazy lunatics who went around killing, harming, and turning everyone into werewolves like them. Remus was also Harry's best teacher and he really did deserve better than to die without being able to raise his son. Also, Tonks deserved better too!