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What do men mean when they say they want women to love them for them

Bubblyflute

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What do men mean when they say they want women to "love them for them." Does it mean just liking someone for existing ?? Liking someone just for their personality?? Because personality is one factor in why women like a man. He can have a "good personality" but be a loser (low income, no education, low skilled job). But to be honest I don't think even that is true.

There is no such thing as having a good personality, but not having the life skills, career, educational achievement that women expect of men. A persons behavior and achievement is part of who they are. It says something about their drive, ambition, self esteem, intelligence. A man could be kind, respectful, okay looking, but I would be xesually repulsed if I found out he was working for Walmart for 10 years and had no intention of looking for better work.

What do men mean??
 

Nitpickr

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oedipal sh!t?

ok being serious: women bank on being pretty, while men bank on having money/status. Nobody wants to be left when all that fades away. its very simple,
 

Slayonge

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Meaning they have not come to terms with hypergamy and want a woman to attach to him exclusively regardless of any tangible benefits to speak of.
 
Last edited:

Jessica Mur

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I feel like it means they want a woman who has no standards. You should simply be happy with his presence and not require anything from him.
 

DrunkBy6

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The vast majority of men say this when they have nothing to offer besides dick & baggage. That tis all!
 

ORNELLA

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It means liking them just for existing. Love them for waking up in the morning and lazing around the house eating, shitting, and sleeping. Don't find any faults with them and worship them. Believe me, there are a LARGE number of women who will do this without any qualms.
 

EtherealBee

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It's often black men who say this. They're typically broke, but love to insinuate black women are golddiggers who only want black men for money despite the vast majority having no wealth to speak of. It's insulting but whatever. These types want to put in zero effort, but still be worshipped for existing. It's a red flag and makes it easier to weed out the trash.
 

Orion Pax

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Loving them and still sticking by them self esteem be damned (women) when they continuously screw up.

More oftentimes than not they have nothing of substance to offer.
 

CuuntyAunty

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What do men mean when they say they want women to "love them for them." Does it mean just liking someone for existing ?? Liking someone just for their personality?? Because personality is one factor in why women like a man. He can have a "good personality" but be a loser (low income, no education, low skilled job). But to be honest I don't think even that is true.

There is no such thing as having a good personality, but not having the life skills, career, educational achievement that women expect of men. A persons behavior and achievement is part of who they are. It says something about their drive, ambition, self esteem, intelligence. A man could be kind, respectful, okay looking, but I would be xesually repulsed if I found out he was working for Walmart for 10 years and had no intention of looking for better work.

What do men mean??
They want you to settle.
 

AreolaGrande

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It means they are any or all of the following tenor-10.gif
 

moxyland

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to have no expectations of them and go along with any whim they may have.
 

xlou

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What do men mean when they say they want women to "love them for them." Does it mean just liking someone for existing ?? Liking someone just for their personality?? Because personality is one factor in why women like a man. He can have a "good personality" but be a loser (low income, no education, low skilled job). But to be honest I don't think even that is true.

There is no such thing as having a good personality, but not having the life skills, career, educational achievement that women expect of men. A persons behavior and achievement is part of who they are. It says something about their drive, ambition, self esteem, intelligence. A man could be kind, respectful, okay looking, but I would be xesually repulsed if I found out he was working for Walmart for 10 years and had no intention of looking for better work.

What do men mean??
It means he’s dusty and he knows it.
 

AI Boyfriend

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Why are you asking a bunch of women who hate most men this question, you know the answers you will get from them. How about ask some men you actually like -- I doubt they have uttered these words to you or any woman.

Most people don't talk in these cliches in real life, it's some social media ish yall always discussing.
 

Star Jones

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It's a vague statement because the woman is then supposed to fill in the blanks for the guy.

He knows that he doesn't have much to "love him for," but also knows that this woman doesn't want to be seen as a gold digger, shallow, mean, someone with a bad attitude, so she'll give him the characteristics that are needed for him to be worthy of love.

It's an offshoot of trying to get a "high maintenance" woman to refrain from doing and enjoying all of the things that the man has never heard of, never had access to, or simply can't afford.

They will both eventually dump the woman when they can't even pretend to be the man she built up, in the first scenario, or when she tires of dealing with the man that she had to stoop down to, in the second scenario.
 

GitchiYaYa

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That’s dusty code for:
I can’t meet your standards so lower them for me
Don’t hold me accountable
This is who I am so I don’t need to change/grow - deal with it
Lower your expectations


basically....RUN
 

Oh Honey

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This is usually said by a broke and ugly man. They basically want women to not have any standards while they have enough requirements to fill two books. They want the top 10% of women when they’re the bottom 10% of men.
 

BotswanaB

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It means they have nothing to offer in terms of money, status, or looks; so women should accept them just for breathing.

Men who say this ain’t loving a woman because of who she is on the inside. The right woman to them is the one who looks the best
 

AI Boyfriend

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They want unconditional love.
Which is stupid to chase. Any man over 25 should have accepted men are not loved unconditionally. Only your mother will love you no matter what and even that can be a toss up depending on the type of person you were born to.
 

CarseyWerner

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Which is stupid to chase. Any man over 25 should have accepted men are not loved unconditionally. Only your mother will love you no matter what and even that can be a toss up depending on the type of person you were born to.
Exactly, if they never had it they will desire it. This is why Suga Mamas reign supreme in the Black community. He expects you to do the emotional labor his mother never did because she was too preoccupied trying to be the daddy cause he was absent.
 

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It means they want to be admired.
Not mothered or expected to live for your needs and desires.
 

Jeveryday

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What do men mean when they say they want women to "love them for them." Does it mean just liking someone for existing ?? Liking someone just for their personality?? Because personality is one factor in why women like a man. He can have a "good personality" but be a loser (low income, no education, low skilled job). But to be honest I don't think even that is true.

There is no such thing as having a good personality, but not having the life skills, career, educational achievement that women expect of men. A persons behavior and achievement is part of who they are. It says something about their drive, ambition, self esteem, intelligence. A man could be kind, respectful, okay looking, but I would be xesually repulsed if I found out he was working for Walmart for 10 years and had no intention of looking for better work.

What do men mean??
My daughter made a joke today about hubby needing to be different while he was trolling her. I told her that I married him for who he was and we just all have to hope that he chooses to be his best version of himself. He just smiled. Maybe it's that. Who knows what randomness they want on a Monday lolol?
 

MissMadd

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The men that say this don’t even have decent personalities, or charisma.

if you ain’t got money, looks, or decent sense of self. What else you got? You’re poor financially, and poor in character.
 

NarcoticVenus

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Most people don't talk in these cliches in real life, it's some social media ish yall always discussing.

Tory, I thought so too until I met one a few years ago.

I think he knew instinctively he couldn't afford me so so he said "I want a woman who will love me for me. A woman who will live with me under a bridge if necessary."

Well, that's all I had to hear. "Sir, I don't live under a bridge now, so there is no reason I would get with you to do that."

And this was a grown-azz 50-year-old man. Damn shame to still be so dusty at that big age.
 

877CashNow

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I can NOT with these bozo men.

I think he knew instinctively he couldn't afford me so so he said "I want a woman who will love me for me. A woman who will live with me under a bridge if necessary."

Well, that's all I had to hear. "Sir, I don't live under a bridge now, so there is no reason I would get with you to do that."

And this was a grown-azz 50-year-old man. Damn shame to still be so dusty at that big age.
 

Bubblyflute

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Tory, I thought so too until I met one a few years ago.

I think he knew instinctively he couldn't afford me so so he said "I want a woman who will love me for me. A woman who will live with me under a bridge if necessary."

Well, that's all I had to hear. "Sir, I don't live under a bridge now, so there is no reason I would get with you to do that."

And this was a grown-azz 50-year-old man. Damn shame to still be so dusty at that big age.
These men are sadistic. If you love a woman you wouldn't fantasize of putting her in that position. And why would someone hitch their wagons for a lifestyle they don't have. I hate how so many men think like this.
 

Ezra Miller

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they want to be accepted/not criticized, not held accountable

basically, worshiped without being worthy of it
 

Mleiao

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What do men mean when they say they want women to "love them for them." Does it mean just liking someone for existing ?? Liking someone just for their personality?? Because personality is one factor in why women like a man. He can have a "good personality" but be a loser (low income, no education, low skilled job). But to be honest I don't think even that is true.

There is no such thing as having a good personality, but not having the life skills, career, educational achievement that women expect of men. A persons behavior and achievement is part of who they are. It says something about their drive, ambition, self esteem, intelligence. A man could be kind, respectful, okay looking, but I would be xesually repulsed if I found out he was working for Walmart for 10 years and had no intention of looking for better work.

What do men mean??
It means being attracted to us for things we didn't acquire. Us dudes can find a woman attractive who is broker than broke, or a billionaire; it's practically irrelevant. So we don't really deep down respect or even understand women who get turned on by material status. There's young handsome dudes right now worth like $290 who will be tech millionaires in a year or two; when the only difference in women attention is a change in financial status, it can breed bitterness and contempt for women, because us men don't move the same way. We checkin' for that fine lady working at Dunkin Donuts.
 

MissMadd

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It means being attracted to us for things we didn't acquire. Us dudes can find a woman attractive who is broker than broke, or a billionaire; it's practically irrelevant. So we don't really deep down respect or even understand women who get turned on by material status. There's young handsome dudes right now worth like $290 who will be tech millionaires in a year or two; when the only difference in women attention is a change in financial status, it can breed bitterness and contempt for women, because us men don't move the same way. We checkin' for that fine lady working at Dunkin Donuts.
so basically men don't like that we have standards?
 

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