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Why are beautiful people with low self esteem more influenced by negative comments then compliments?

Do you think beautiful women get more compliments them put downs

  • Beautiful women get more compliments then they get out downs

    Votes: 10 45.5%
  • Beautiful women get more put downs then compliments

    Votes: 3 13.6%
  • It is even

    Votes: 3 13.6%
  • I don’t know

    Votes: 6 27.3%

  • Total voters
    22

Sophia2000

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Why are beautiful people with low self esteem more influenced by negative comments then compliments?

We often say society teaches black women to hate ourselves but it also teaches us to love ourselves too. From likes and comments that tell beautiful women they are beautiful how are you gravitating more to the negative comments? Like for every ugly comment you get 20 compliments. And argue with the one person that think you ugly are not show gratitude with the 20 that think you are beautiful
 

Ashlyan

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It depends on what motivates us and inspires our minds to think. Some people function better in dysfunction and shun the good stuff. Pay attention to the threads that get more energy and go trending. It's the same vibe.
 

buttahpecan_

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I get complimented a lot on my looks but most of the time I’m my biggest critic so even if I’m looking my best I’ll find something wrong
 
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Sophia2000

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I get complimented a lot on my looks but most of the time I’m my biggest critic
This. And I have a hard time accepting that “society teaches us to hate ourselves” arguement as to why so many of us have self esteem issues when society teaches everyone to hate themselves.
More so women I know, but we act like lil black boys didn’t grow up playing with white action figures, playing with white video game characters as the main role g.I Joe wrestling figures yet that doesn’t have the same effect as black girls playing with white dolls
 

Sophia2000

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Because everyone’s minds are designed to focus on the negative, in general.
Yeah but then why when a unattractive person is complimented or a person who is beautiful but society deems as unattractive is complimented they are way more likely to be receptive to their compliments then a pretty person is.

I see so many women who aren’t classified as pretty blush when they are complimented while the ones deemed pretty are unbothered
 

Ava Gardner

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Yeah but then why when a unattractive person is complimented or a person who is beautiful but society deems as unattractive is complimented they are way more likely to be receptive to their compliments then a pretty person is.

I see so many women who aren’t classified as pretty blush when they are complimented while the ones deemed pretty are unbothered
Because those people were not targeted by jealous people who said things to them to try to bring them down, or they like the way they look and don’t care what other people think, and those people aren’t unattractive just because you say they are (beauty is in the eye of the beholder).
 

Ms Muse

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We often say society teaches black women to hate ourselves but it also teaches us to love ourselves too.
People might learn to love themselves, but society teaches BW that what they love about themselves is cause for the negative treatment they receive, so I'm not sure this argument is equal across all ethnicities.

In the case of that crying yt, I think she was so used to being uplifted that she'd never really felt the other side of the spectrum. My guess is that she knows she's not all that facially, and that this confirms her insecurity that maybe she doesn't deserve the push she's getting (looks wise or acting wise).

Love your threads btw lol
 

Sophia2000

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Beauty is subjective but self esteem is not subjective Tons of unattractive are targeted. There are tons of unattractive people that don’t like how they look and tons of attractive people that don’t like how they look. Beauty is subjective but how a person responds to people that view them as beautiful is not subjective
Because those people were not targeted by jealous people who said things to them to try to bring them down, or they like the way they look and don’t care what other people think, and those people aren’t unattractive just because you say they are (beauty is in the eye of the beholder).
 

Amuro

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Even if a beautiful person gets complimented all the times and were never criticized for their looks, they can have low self esteem with different aspects in life (feeling accepted, deserving of a healthy realtionship etc)
 

Sophia2000

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Even if a beautiful person gets complimented all the times and were never criticized for their looks, they can have low self esteem with different aspects in life (feeling accepted, deserving of a healthy realtionship etc)
Referring to the pretty ones that have self esteem issues about their looks I.e Lil Kim
 

Sophia2000

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People might learn to love themselves, but society teaches BW that what they love about themselves is cause for the negative treatment they receive, so I'm not sure this argument is equal across all ethnicities.

In the case of that crying yt, I think she was so used to being uplifted that she'd never really felt the other side of the spectrum. My guess is that she knows she's not all that facially, and that this confirms her insecurity that maybe she doesn't deserve the push she's getting (looks wise or acting wise).

Love your threads btw lol
Issue I have is anything that is taught can be untaught.
And just because someone has a lesson doesn’t mean I have to learn it. I have failed many of classes.
I guess to me it is if everyone tells you that you are beautiful & that isn’t teaching you then something deeper is going on
 

Amuro

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Referring to the pretty ones that have self esteem issues about their looks I.e Lil Kim
well Little Kim had an abusive realtionship with her father and numerous other men. She commented that most of these men left her for lighter skinned women so she internalized it. Someone who dealt with that amount of trauma will not focus on the millions good compliments that people gave her.
 
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Nitpickr

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Yes human nature. Not pretty people nature. So why is this seen as a issue only with beautiful people?
Because we see pretty people as having it all. They have more so we think “they should be grateful of what they have!”
 

Games

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The need for outside validation is not rooted in love and truth, so what ends up happening is you get knocked down because your soul and spirit is urging you to not care about what others think of you. Comments should be turned off, and if they aren't turned off, they shouldn't be read. If they have to be read, then the negative comments should be removed and the person who said it, blocked.

It is very simple, but I understand celebs and conventionally attractive people being hypersensitive because their livelihood is tied to what people think of them. They should hire social media personnel to monitor their comment sections. Once we know you're sensitive, the trolls rejoice, and really go in.
 

Sophia2000

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well Little Kim had an abusive realtionship with her father and numerous other men. She commented that most of these men left her for lighter skinned women so she internalized it. Someone who dealt with that amount of trauma will not focus on the millions good compliments that her people gave her.
I vaguely could recall this but soon as you said it memories stirred up. This begs the question are lil girls conditioned or is it in their nature to seek the validation of their father? When Lil girls twirl in their dress so their father tell them how beautiful they are is it that they are conditioned by society or is it in lil girls nature to want to seek validation specifically from their father as opposed to their mother?
 

Lori O

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Yeah but then why when a unattractive person is complimented or a person who is beautiful but society deems as unattractive is complimented they are way more likely to be receptive to their compliments then a pretty person is.

I see so many women who aren’t classified as pretty blush when they are complimented while the ones deemed pretty are unbothered
I agree with the other op's it's human nature. Most pretty people don't acknowledge compliments because they get it so often it means nothing. Unattractive people may seem to blush but in actuality may think someone is on bs for complementing them. So it's all the same the unattractive person focused on the negative over the positive.
 

Amuro

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I vaguely could recall this but soon as you said it memories stirred up. This begs the question are lil girls conditioned or is it in their nature to seek the validation of their father? When Lil girls twirl in their dress so their father tell them how beautiful they are is it that they are conditioned by society or is it in lil girls nature to want to seek validation specifically from their father as opposed to their mother?

I think children seek validation from both parents, some children may lean to their father or mother depending on their realtionship. From my perspective with me not having my biological father in my life and having numerous step dads who some I have had healthy relationships and others straight up abusive, I do think that made how I see men in general quite warped.
 

Sophia2000

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I think children seek validation from both parents, some children may lean to their father or mother depending on their realtionship. From my perspective with me not having my biological father in my life and having numerous step dads who some I have had healthy relationships and others straight up abusive, I do think that made how I see men in general quite warped.
You said it, children do seek validation from both parents. But I notice when a woman doesn’t get it from her father she often seeks it from other men I.e boys.
To me boys don’t really do it as much. I know boys that their fathers wanted them to play baseball and instead of doing it to make their dads proud and happy they was like “naw I like this anime over here kick rocks dad” but that is just my observation
 

Sophia2000

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I agree with the other op's it's human nature. Most pretty people don't acknowledge compliments because they get it so often it means nothing. Unattractive people may seem to blush but in actuality may think someone is on bs for complementing them. So it's all the same the unattractive person focused on the negative over the positive.
But in the same breath if you get enough insults shouldn’t it mean nothing you get used to it or is that part of human nature as well? I know so many women that want to go to France specifically to be courted by French men and to be adorned with compliments. Also if pretty people are so used to compliments that it means nothing what is the purpose of taking 500 selfies in a day and posting it if you are not a social media influencer?
 

Lori O

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But in the same breath if you get enough insults shouldn’t it mean nothing you get used to it or is that part of human nature as well? I know so many women that want to go to France specifically to be courted by French men and to be adorned with compliments. Also if pretty people are so used to compliments that it means nothing what is the purpose of taking 500 selfies in a day and posting it if you are not a social media influencer?
Validation! Pretty doesn't negate ugly inside. Know one pretty or ugly is taking 500 selfies a day unless they need validation.
 

Sannyssa

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Because they have low self esteem? You kind of answered your own question already.
 

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