OP the truth is that BW are considered the "property" of the black community. We are supposed to love and be loyal to our "owners" no matter what they do....good or bad. Fair or unfair. They hate the idea that any of us would choose other men because that would crack the façade of the black community being "good owners".
BTW this only applies to BW, BM can do whatever they wish as the "owner's" beloved sons. The beloved sons are FREE to choose whomever they desire. They are free to exclude whomever they wish. They are even freely allowed to express displeasure and disdain against women whom share their own features. The beloved sons get pats on the back and attaboys for choosing women from other tribes by the black community.
Owners will always become angry when their "property" rises up to do what is in her own individual best interest. It is to be expected.
I have stopped having conversations with black people about anything regarding IRR in real life because there is absolutely nothing to be gained from their open hostility and advice that is obviously not in my best interest. Why would the "owner" want to set their "property" free.
I just want to be clear you're using a slavery analogy talking about "the Black community" vis-a-vis the non Black (really meaning white) community?
I literally was in the library the other day reading slave narratives. They broke out the interviewers that were white and the interviewers that were Black.
I only read a few but some of the slaves didn't immediately leave because they were tricked into staying or had no where else to go. Frankly based on what I read it depended mainly if the massa was "mean" or not.