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Why do I attract criminals?

Heaux

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I swear i have the worst luck in men. I’ve been in countless sh!tty situations when it comes to dating, i’ve had fµcked up things happen to me so i thought i’d go for an older man, i finally find one who i deem is ‘worthy’. An island man in his late 30s from Bermuda who migrated to my state many years ago who has his own security business, and does personal training too, seems to make good money, owns a really nice beach house. I met him at a lounge and the chemistry has been something that reminds me of my first love. I have been nothing but courted, treated like a queen, he even took me out on a boat for a quick dinner for my lunch break. He has shown me things I have never seen before.

Turns out I ended up googling him, and let me tell u what i saw was nothing but shocking. Articles upon articles about court cases linking him to murder, bank theft, other suspect activities and how he fled his home country due to safety reasons, i ended up confronting him over text and he ended up crying, claiming he was innocent and if he was those things he wouldn’t be able to be in the position he is in with his own business etc.. He said the ball is in my court and i can call the shots but he says he has grown to really love my company.

I just feel like all my previous boyfriends, situationships, they’ve all ended up being criminals. My first love is still in jail for the sh!t he did. Has anyone else have this problem? what am i doing wrong? why can’t i find a decent man? Would you date a criminal?
 
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Belleofthesouth

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I'm sorry but. I can't stop laughing ohmygawd. Op you gotta ask more questions on your dates.

G0RXc.gif
 

InterwebsCousin

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Did I read :emoji_eyeglasses: murder? MURDER? MURDER?
IMG_6646.GIF

OP, quietly and very nicely backup out of that situation.

There's a non criminal upstanding man out there for you.:emoji_pray:

You just have to be ready when you two meet.
 

XUserX

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Stop dating and focus on work and education for a while. The men you are surrounded by in a year are likely to be better quality and you’ll naturally avoid the losers
 

ForRealDoe?

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Stop looking at the material things (which could be ill-gotten) and focus on character. All that man had to do was show you a beach house (that may not be his), spend a few bucks and buy a few meals and you were ready to commit to him.

Hustlers know how to attract women who are not really about much except the material. As the other poster said, focus on improving yourself so you'll attract higher quality men.
 

SugahPlum

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Articles upon articles about court cases linking him to murder, bank theft, other suspect activities and how he fled his home country due to safety reasons

he ended up crying, claiming he was innocent

He said the ball is in my court and i can call the shots but he says he has grown to really love my company.


tenor.gif


Are you still with him?
 

shady_boots

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That’s a tough one op. I have a friend that slept with two murderers. She’s violent her damn self but not crazy enough to kill someone. I always figured she attracts that kind of man. She sees nothing wrong with it but u seem to have a conscious about it. Only advice I have is to do a background check when you first meet a man. Like he walks up to you, introduces himself, you ask his name and google him on the spot. People are CRAZY and it’s best to know who they are before you develop feelings.
 

Omniscience

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Is that really how you regard yourself?

You have no control over men lying/being deceptive or being a criminal but you do have control over whether or not you keep seeing him after finding out.

And no sane person will ever advise you to keep seeing this person.
 

Genovese

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I attract what I am. One side of my family is straight crooked while the other is straight laced. It's just in our nature. Majority of the men I've dated in my life were dangerous, and the ones that were squeaky clean, I corrupted them to some degree. It is the reason I pursued Law as a major and Psychology as a minor.
 

DemiLovato

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I swear i have the worst luck in men. I’ve been in countless sh!tty situations when it comes to dating, i’ve had fµcked up things happen to me so i thought i’d go for an older man, i finally find one who i deem is ‘worthy’. An island man in his late 30s from Bermuda who migrated to my state many years ago who has his own security business, and does personal training too, seems to make good money, owns a really nice beach house. I met him at a lounge and the chemistry has been something that reminds me of my first love. I have been nothing but courted, treated like a queen, he even took me out on a boat for a quick dinner for my lunch break. He has shown me things I have never seen before.

Turns out I ended up googling him, and let me tell u what i saw was nothing but shocking. Articles upon articles about court cases linking him to murder, bank theft, other suspect activities and how he fled his home country due to safety reasons, i ended up confronting him over text and he ended up crying, claiming he was innocent and if he was those things he wouldn’t be able to be in the position he is in with his own business etc.. He said the ball is in my court and i can call the shots but he says he has grown to really love my company.

I just feel like all my previous boyfriends, situationships, they’ve all ended up being criminals. My first love is still in jail for the sh!t he did. Has anyone else have this problem? what am i doing wrong? why can’t i find a decent man? Would you date a criminal?


I think it was LESS THAN SMART to seek an explanation.

You keep attracting criminals because your standards are low. He said it's not true... now what?

I don't care if it was true or not. If I read ALL of that about a person I JUST met I would GHOST him. I don't need to know nothing. He wouldn't be worth my time.

Don't be desperate, be desirable and your desirability will attract high quality men.

Run sis. Smdh

And how old are you by the way?
 

DemiLovato

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I attract what I am. One side of my family is straight crooked while the other is straight laced. It's just in our nature. Majority of the men I've dated in my life were dangerous, and the ones that were squeaky clean, I corrupted them to some degree. It is the reason I pursued Law as a major and Psychology as a minor.

My family is crooked on both sides...but in different ways.

My moms side is full of white collar criminals and grade A finessers... they do insurance fraud, Workman comp fraud, and play men at a high level... and my Dads side is full of crooks and thieves.

Smh born in to it. I try to be a good person of integrity and judicial correctness, but i do have my ways about myself!!! Hey I got it honest! Lol
 
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Ojebeta

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You are what you entertain OP, now that you know of his criminal activities, are you going to keep seeing him? The fact that I had to ask you that is a problem in itself, drop him and change your sorroundings if possible.
 

DemiLovato

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You are what you entertain OP, now that you know of his criminal activities, are you going to keep seeing him? The fact that I had to ask you that is a problem in itself, drop him and change your sorroundings if possible.

Exactly. And it's like a cheater- once you know and you stay, you accept it and will be exposed to it again. And cheaters know this.

This will give him all the control and power in the relationship.

If you stay with this man, who does not deserve you to stay then you are teaching him that all of that is ok by you and you will still
Be by his side.

I hope you don't stick with this dude. He's just gonna bring you down and become a thorn in your side.
 

MajesticLife

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Op bout to have accounts in the cayman lslands, f what yau'll talking about. She about to be Bonnie, for the 15th time and she won't understand its not a hood movie until the feds surround her car, search it and find kilo's of coke she didn't even know were in there. She might understand this is real life then...or they could get away with it and live happily ever after with all the illegal money being laundered through that security company.

Op just make sure you give us a heads up when the story gets juicy, so I can have my popcorn ready. You sure dudes name ain't Gregory Ruval?
 

glicampsen

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OP, the ball is in your court now since you know who he is. It's not your fault whether you have attracted criminals, bums, or billionaires!! What you do after knowing who he is matters!
giphy.gif
 

Gull

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You are what you attract
Not necessarily......you are who you select from who you attract...

You can attract all kinds....you just don't have to select them....

OP obviously need better discernment skills and probably work on her values a little....
 

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