Why do men these days ask you to have their baby as if they’re proposing to you?

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:disdain come now...

This type of mentality only germinates within a discrete group of dyfunctional underclass Black folks. Cut them out of your life and you won't have men perpetually disrespect you [yes, girls, this is disrespectful].

:bulgyeyes

I responded to you in confusion for using the term "Blackistani" I don't even know where to start.
I've never heard a Black person use that term.

You looking real suspect right now.
 
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A brother put me on and shared 'the secret' with me, he was more like warning me. If he brings up having babies, without ever bringing up marriage, it's just to make sure he has you hooked on him. He doesn't have to out out any more effort. He's roaming for permanent access to your punani.
I remember when they used to simply bait with marriage and never ending engagements but there's a newer version called "let's have a baby".

It also works well due to negative outlook many of have on marriage, so the low expectations on marriage, life and building a family allows such talks to sound good to some. Even the smartest women out here...

Sooo ladies, be warned. Him asking you for a baby, is for him a way to get YOU hooked on HIM. He also disarms you like that for the rest of your life...
Thank you ! nothing but game.That's a shame because it affects the kids,I think they all deserve to at least start out with parents together.Thats just me I guess.
 
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Since when do men see having a baby being in the same category as getting marred?


Could it be that some men just don't wanna get married & are careless with who they sleep with without protection? I live in FL and 95 percent of the men I've met (dating profiles, coworkers) have kids & have never been married or engaged and some not even in a relationship with the child's mom. Not that it's a bad thing or good thing. It is what it is. Having a baby isnt a magical experience in terms of relationships in my opinion. If it was such a wonderful loving thing to do, all of these babies would not be born into broken foundations. it's just the product of two careless people.


also, not everyone wants to get married & there is nothing wrong with that. I don't think men see kids as a way to commit for life, they probably just don't want to be tied down romantically but they don't mind being a parent. Some men & women just don't care and when it comes to sex they'll say anything to get a nut in that moment.


I'd be insulted if a guy just wanted to have a kid with me, but shyed away from wanting to marry me. you can walk away if things don't work out in a marriage, kids literally bond you for life, it's the weirdest thing to me. But I would only be insulted if our intent was the same. I wouldn’t pursue a relationship with a man that didn't wanna get married & i usually state my intentions on marriage and kids early on before things even get to that level of seriousness.


So imo, if both people want or don't want the same thing (marriage, serious relationship etc), I don't think it's that bad. & I think the whole biological clock is ticking plays a big part in it as well.
 
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I don’t care what anyone says, this is abnormal. You as a woman are a complete idiot if you birth a child for a man who won’t go to the courthouse with you and sign a marriage license long before trying for a child.

No man asking this question seriously is of the caliber that any woman should be dating. He’s essentially saying you’re good enough to incubate my child but I don’t value you enough to commit to you. As a woman you should not be ok with that.

I have never ever heard of anything like this. It sounds ghetto for lack of a better word. Do not give a man a legacy when he’s not giving you his resources or commitment in the form of marriage, especially if you’re young. Just say no.


It's not abnormal. I'm not sure why a lot of people in general think that women are born and raised with the obsession of being a wife and mother. There are plenty of women who don't wanna get married, or reach a point in their life where being a parent is more important then getting married. It's only a bad thing when the woman wants to get married and the guy doesn't.
 
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Thank you ! nothing but game.That's a shame because it affects the kids,I think they all deserve to at least start out with parents together.Thats just me I guess.


girl this! It for sure is a subtle way of the whole "you knew what you were signing up for" schtick. However, as a woman, choosing to stay when being told this information is on you. A lot of kids are walking around with multiple siblings on their dads side because the man is just the sperm donor. I's easy to have a gaggle of kids when you arent the one carrying them. lol
 
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It's not abnormal. I'm not sure why a lot of people in general think that women are born and raised with the obsession of being a wife and mother. There are plenty of women who don't wanna get married, or reach a point in their life where being a parent is more important then getting married. It's only a bad thing when the woman wants to get married and the guy doesn't.

The vast majority of women want to get married and have children within a stable happy marriage. There is far more risk to having a child without the support of a spouse than the opposite for most women.

I didn’t say women shouldn’t pursue motherhood if they want, however they have options for that which do not include involving a man they may or may not be seeing consistently. If most women actually wanted motherhood and to do it alone, they would go to a fertility clinic or would never request child support or tell the father about it. Most baby mamas don’t actually want that and everyone knows that.

You can say whatever you want but married and/or stable couples generally produce children with better social outcomes.
 

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