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Would you date a man that lives with his parents?

Amandabby22

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No. I have my own place so it wouldn’t make sense for me. No judgement but it just wouldn’t work.

If I was still living with my parents @ my big age (26) I wouldn’t ever fix my lips to criticize someone else for being in the same situation I’m in.. granted we probably shouldn’t be dating at all if that’s the case.

:whistle: But let’s see how many fonts follow that same sentiment.
 

Queen Ann

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Depends on who is paying the bills.

A man who is taking care of his infirm/elderly parent or parents and paying the bills is a man who is loving. Lot of older men care for elderly parents. If he's not paying anything that makes me suspicious, and chances are he's looking at you or me as providers, and I refuse to be a grown man's provider or more accurately his mule because he wants xes, entertainment, housekeeping, and counselor from women plus his bills paid.

If he's at the parental home with no job or dependent on his parents aka making less than me and looking at me to pay all the bills like Mom and Dad, no. I do work I love with a far too low salary and a lousy union as it is. I send money to my parents. A man who's doing what I'm doing I respect. A man sleeping in his parents' house with no job and no plans to get a job with benefits will soon expect you to be his lover and his bank.

I made that mistake twice in my 20s and paid dearly for that. At 52 I insist that "he" needs to make good use of his male privilege and support himself. Even Black men make more than Black women in the same job/same experience. Right now in DC Black men who work "good" jobs make more than I do and I have a Ph.D.

Your very good question opens lots of other questions that I hope will spark a lively discussion.
 
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AlexJordan

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How do you know if his parents actually live with him out of necessity? What if he was taken care of a parent because the parent was ill or a widow(er) who didn’t want to live alone?

You first need to understand the “why” as it could be deceiving and the guy could just actually love and care for his parent(s). Dismissing him on first glance might make you lose a really good man.
 

Loveless246

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If they are using the opportunity to save money and buy themselves a home. Sure why not.
 

yesyas

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As bad as the economy is (so they say) I haven’t met many guys who live with their parents. They don’t even have roommates.

I’d have to say No because it’d be weird going backwards like that. I like walking around naked after fresh xes. Plus I’m loud. Don’t want the ‘rents hating their future daughter in law so early lol
 

AntiSocialyte

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Depends on the reason why.

If it's because he's lazy or just doesn't want to live on his own. . then no.

But if he's taking care of his elderly parents, saving up to buy a home, or it's a short term solution then I don't see why not.
 

daguerreotype

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I'm not too particular if he isn't financially dependent on his parents and has his own space (like living in the basement that's an in-law suite or has been converted into an apartment).
 

Unicornesque

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Idk...cuz some n- will flex and say "My parents live with me", when it's really the other way around...and that's highkey scrubbish...

OR try to be at your place ALL the time...and I do not house hobosexuals, I'm hobophobic...:confused5
 

Southernchic

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Lol I’m just like what if y’all are looking to have xes and he would have to come to your house all of the time. Chile.
 

S O S Y E

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My husband lived with his parents until he was 29 (he moved back home after grad school). He bought us a beautiful home (mortgage paid off in 4 years), subsequently bought one 4-unit and one 6-unit apartment building, has a great investment portfolio and lots of money saved. He was also able to provide a significant amount of start-up capital for my business...which allowed me the freedom to leave my job on my terms.

I'm glad I dated him. I always had my own place but he was very respectful about spending the night. He didn't try to move himself into my place and didn't allow himself to get too comfortable.

Everyone is different, but I wouldn't write a man off because he lived at home. I wouldn't, but that's me. Yall can set your own dating criteria.
 

Maxine

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I need a man to be on the same page as me so no. I don't live at home and I don't want him living at home either.
 

AnnDee

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Depends

I do know some people who their parents live with them because their parents are older and there are a lot of things they can’t do as far around a house. Then I know people who moved in with their parents or grandparents for the same reason. But a lazy moocher then no. I dated a guy who is an immigrant and was living with his mom who is naturalized citizen. I overlooked it because he owns a house back in the Dominican Republic which he has a mortgage to pay so I figured he was trying to same up money. His mom was sweet But the lack of privacy was an issue. I really didn’t feel comfortable because she was a minister and I thought Lord might strike me down if I got freaky deaky in her home. We broke up but it had nothing to do with her.
 

CherryHunter

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I still live with mine lol. But for that reason I would prefer if he had his own place so we could have somewhere private to go but it obviously wouldn't be a determining factor in if we date or not.
 

Southernchic

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My husband lived with his parents until he was 29 (he moved back home after grad school). He bought us a beautiful home (mortgage paid off in 4 years), subsequently bought one 4-unit and one 6-unit apartment building, has a great investment portfolio and lots of money saved. He was also able to provide a significant amount of start-up capital for my business...which allowed me the freedom to leave my job on my terms.

I'm glad I dated him. I always had my own place but he was very respectful about spending the night. He didn't try to move himself into my place and didn't allow himself to get too comfortable.

Everyone is different, but I wouldn't write a man off because he lived at home. I wouldn't, but that's me. Yall can set your own dating criteria.
Damn!!!! That’s awesome. Makes me look at it differently.
 

IrisOsiris

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My coworker and I had this debate. Personally if I were on the market, I would not. Hell no.
I would. Especially depending on what he did for a living. And just cuz hes living with his parents doesnt mean he doesnt own the house or that he isnt living with them to take care of them and help them with their own day to day needs and expenses. Id actually think that very responsible of a man to do.
 

IrisOsiris

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If they are using the opportunity to save money and buy themselves a home. Sure why not.
Exactly. Thats fiscally responsible and more black folks would be much better off if this were common practice for us like it is for people of other races.
 

MEEEETOOO

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As a full grown ass woman hell naw, now if I were a young lady still in college or high school perhaps..
 

DynastyKnows

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No cuz most of the time they’re selfish and entitled and don’t understand why you, a person who actually has real bills to pay, don’t want their broke asses staying at your house every night when you gottta get up for work. Most are hobosexuals looking for housing assistance, not love
 

Hi5Perry

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OK so My friend's daughter is dating a guy that live in the guest house. Does that count? He's 24 years old and she said he's paying off student loans before he venture out into this cruel world.
The area I live in has a lot of guest houses/apartments, either attached or detached from the main house. Some rent out to strangers but many of them are family. I recently met a divorced guy who lives in a 3/2 attached to his parent's house. I don't consider that living with his parents. He makes good money, travels a lot for work & pays all his bills. It's no different than having his own place except it's much cheaper
 

SpiritSFJ9

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How do you know if his parents actually live with him out of necessity? What if he was taken care of a parent because the parent was ill or a widow(er) who didn’t want to live alone?

You first need to understand the “why” as it could be deceiving and the guy could just actually love and care for his parent(s). Dismissing him on first glance might make you lose a really good man.

If they are using the opportunity to save money and buy themselves a home. Sure why not.

Depends on the reason why.

If it's because he's lazy or just doesn't want to live on his own. . then no.

But if he's taking care of his elderly parents, saving up to buy a home, or it's a short term solution then I don't see why not.

My husband lived with his parents until he was 29 (he moved back home after grad school). He bought us a beautiful home (mortgage paid off in 4 years), subsequently bought one 4-unit and one 6-unit apartment building, has a great investment portfolio and lots of money saved. He was also able to provide a significant amount of start-up capital for my business...which allowed me the freedom to leave my job on my terms.

I'm glad I dated him. I always had my own place but he was very respectful about spending the night. He didn't try to move himself into my place and didn't allow himself to get too comfortable.

Everyone is different, but I wouldn't write a man off because he lived at home. I wouldn't, but that's me. Yall can set your own dating criteria.

I would. Especially depending on what he did for a living. And just cuz hes living with his parents doesnt mean he doesnt own the house or that he isnt living with them to take care of them and help them with their own day to day needs and expenses. Id actually think that very responsible of a man to do.

Agreed with these. It really depends. I just can't ASSUME a man is lazy and that's why he lives with his parents...it has to be a specific reason, something that is around building his life (i.e saving to buy a home etc).


I don't know why some people never care about the reasons or the why's. To me, That's just tossing the baby out with the bath water, no why or reason needed. Lol.
 

Kelly Price

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Sure. He might be stacking their money...or sh!t it could be a family compound. Im down as long as you have your own space
 

ChenoaDarling

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so if he lives with his parents...its a no....but would date a man who lives with his wife??
i saw this on a meme i felt this was an opportune time
*groan me idc*
 

VersacePrincess

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If they are using the opportunity to save money and buy themselves a home. Sure why not.
Yeah end thread.

Im 25 yr old female living at home to save up to get myself a place and take care of my grandmother since I'm the immediate family member she has. I try my best to provide for her as much as she helps me out.

So by default I can't offer my 2cents. But it if he living at home with goals and working towards it then Ok. But if he bumming then no.

this Asian asshole name rice gum once said women dont wanna date a man who live at home and but don't man dating a man who already got a whole home, family and wife.

Some of that is true despite how douchey it sounds.
 

VersacePrincess

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Agreed with these. It really depends. I just can't ASSUME a man is lazy and that's why he lives with his parents...it has to be a specific reason, something that is around building his life (i.e saving to buy a home etc).


I don't know why some people never care about the reasons or the why's. To me, That's just tossing the baby out with the bath water, no why or reason needed. Lol.
End thread that's the case most of the time. Women be living at home too.
 

Ari24

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Like Coltees mom didn't want to be alone lol I could not have a relationship with a man that lives at home personally it is too weird for me lol Do you have sexxx with the mom there or dad? lol

Some parents never want to be alone and unless they are sick I don't understand why they would live with you or you would live with them at such an adult older age unless they are sick. I could never have sexxx in my parents or feel comfortable having that adult relationship there but that's just me
 

Ari24

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My husband lived with his parents until he was 29 (he moved back home after grad school). He bought us a beautiful home (mortgage paid off in 4 years), subsequently bought one 4-unit and one 6-unit apartment building, has a great investment portfolio and lots of money saved. He was also able to provide a significant amount of start-up capital for my business...which allowed me the freedom to leave my job on my terms.

I'm glad I dated him. I always had my own place but he was very respectful about spending the night. He didn't try to move himself into my place and didn't allow himself to get too comfortable.

Everyone is different, but I wouldn't write a man off because he lived at home. I wouldn't, but that's me. Yall can set your own dating criteria.
Well I hope he helped them pay the bills and mortgage. I have a cousin that refuses to give my Aunt any money for bills and she has asked him to split half the bills with her but he said he won't because hes saving up to buy a house just like he saved up and bought his brand new car in full now he wants to buy a house so she has to pay for everything even the groceries she buys for them both. His dad made him pay half the bills but then when he died he stopped and refuses to give his mom anything for years. Also hes only had like three girlfriends I think they dumped him because he lives with his mom. Also my Aunt lives in an old house that needs a lot of work and it is going to take a lot of money and she always ask him to pitch in to fix up the house but he refuses and says this is your house not mine and I'm going to move out when I save up enough money and always tells her I have to save. So as long as a guy is not taking advantage of his parents and actually helps them but most women will think it is strange a guy that old that still lives with his parents. Also my cousin does not clean or cook or do his own laundry
 

Ricky1993

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I'm assuming most ya'll are all American because living with family is normal outside of Western cultures...
 

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